Cypress man rescued by pet pug — Orange County Register, July 26, 2007 I’m not surprised by this. Pugs are smart, brave, loving and loyal. Do not underestimate the pug. Your canine correspondent, Lightning Epps Read more →
EppsNet Archive: Orange County
Did She Find an Aardvark?
Ann Avery Andres has been selected as the Foreperson for the 2007/2008 [Orange County] Grand Jury, which will begin its term July 2. — Orange County Register Albert Andreas Armadillo was unavailable? Read more →
Inspiration Point, Laguna Beach
Originally uploaded by david888lee. Read more →
EppsNet Restaurant Review: Norm’s
I hadn’t been to a Norm’s restaurant in years. There isn’t one in my neighborhood. We discovered this one because it’s close to the new place where my son’s taking percussion lessons. Not only was the boy able to get two eggs, two sausages, two pieces of bacon, half a dinner plate full of hash browns, and two gigantic slabs of French toast with butter and syrup for only $5.99, he managed to polish off the whole thing before I even finished my salad. Excellent value! Rating: Five stars. Read more →
OK, So They Were Violent and Crazy
More details are emerging on the crazy naked woman with a gun case . . . Not surprisingly, despite a neighbor’s assertion that Kevin and Joni Park “were not violent or crazy,” it turns out that they were in fact violent and crazy. Read more →
They Were Not Violent or Crazy
Here’s an offbeat local item as reported in the Orange County Register: Kevin and Joni Park were shot and killed in an oceanfront bungalow at the Montage [a Laguna Beach hotel where bungalows start at $2,200 a night] on Sunday where they had checked in with a semiautomatic handgun and a bag of extra ammunition. The Parks were killed in a confrontation with police after officers were summoned to the hotel at 7:40 a.m. by several 911 callers, who reported a naked, “crazy woman” with a gun who was threatening them in Treasure Island Park, at the southern end of the five-star resort. Mrs. Park appears to be naked in the accompanying photo as well. Was she a nudist? The Register is silent on this point. One of the Parks’ neighbors says that “they were not violent or crazy.” No, they were not violent or crazy. I ask you: who… Read more →
Good News for Meth Addicts
I’m reading the ads on the back page of the current OC Weekly: DO YOU USE CRYSTAL METH? Alcohol Related Problems? We Can Help You! ERASE YOUR CRIMINAL RECORD I’ve never been a big fan of OC Weekly and now I understand why. It’s written for a target audience of criminals, alcoholics and meth addicts. Good news though if you are in fact a meth addict: according to the ad, a professor at UCLA is doing a research study and handing out up to $1,075 in gift certificates to qualified participants. Note that you don’t get the money in cash because you’d probably just go out and spend it on crystal meth . . . Read more →
Some People Should Be Allowed to Work at Their Own Pace
Speaking of motivation, today’s Orange County Register has a story about a guy who really knows — or knew — how to light a fire under his employees. According to the story, Woo Sung Park, a landscaping supervisor, told day laborer Ernesto Avalos that he, Avalos, was not pulling his weight on the job. The pep talk so energized Mr. Avalos that he beat Mr. Park to death with a shovel and a pickax. This happened right here in Irvine! Tragically, one of my rich neighbors is now two men short on his beautification project . . . Read more →
Choosing the Right Breed
I saw this headline in the Orange County Register: Man fleeing burning Dana Point condo bitten by his dog My first thought was, “What kind of a dog turns on its owner in a crisis? It’s got to be a pit bull.” Sure enough . . . A pit bull spooked by the flames and smoke turned on his owner as the man tried to escape the flames with the dog in his arms. The man, who lived in the condo where the fire started, was badly bitten on both arms. The man left a trail of blood down the stairs. The dog was not hurt in the blaze. The dog wasn’t hurt, although an officer on the scene did offer to shoot the animal to keep the owner from being mangled any worse than he already was, an offer the owner declined. “Please don’t shoot my dog!” he pleaded.… Read more →
Another Reason I Let My Wife Handle the Holiday Decorations
Aliso Viejo man dies after falling while hanging Christmas lights — Orange County Register This cautionary tale includes a helpful tip from the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission: Falls from ladders or rooftops are comical in the movies, but in reality, they can be a very dangerous thing. Actually, falls from ladders and rooftops can be funny in real life too, but only when they happen to someone else. See also: Another Reason I Let My Wife Handle the Grocery Shopping Read more →
Black Father of the Year
NEWPORT BEACH — Two Los Angeles residents believed to be a father and a daughter were arrested early today near John Wayne Airport on suspicion of burglarizing four local businesses, authorities said. Donald Perkins, 48, and Kenesha Perkins, 28, were pulled over for speeding at about 3:15 a.m. near Dove Street and Newport Place Drive, said Sgt. Evan Sailor of the Newport Beach Police Department. — Orange County Register Kenesha Perkins is a lucky girl . . . most black fathers are not actively involved in their children’s activities like this . . . Read more →
Divorce Wizards
I was walking through a business park in Newport Beach today when I saw a company called Divorce Wizards . . . I am the Divorce Wizard! With a wave of my wand, I free you from the shackles of matrimony! I cleanse your mind of bitterness and recrimination, as though the whole sorry episode never happened! Uh, thanks . . . can you make me twenty years younger again too? Read more →
Brush with Greatness
I saw Lindsay Davenport yesterday at Borders in South Coast Plaza. She was sitting in the cafe area talking with another woman when I walked past. I had to double back to make sure it was really her. I expect famous people to be larger than life, and Lindsay Davenport is a big girl anyway, so I’m thinking that she should be gigantic, which she wasn’t. But I walked past a second time and it was definitely her . . . Read more →
Tennis Parents Can Blow Me
My kid plays Team Tennis here in Irvine . . . on Saturdays, they play other teams from around Orange County. Tennis parents are obsessive, just like hockey parents. The difference is that hockey parents can scream at the kids, refs, coaches, other parents, passers-by, etc., during the games, whereas tennis etiquette requires parents to stay quiet during the matches and berate the kids afterwards. My son’s team played the Balboa Bay Racquet Club team this past weekend. One of the smug tennis dads on our team showed up wearing a backpack with his own racket in it. Now why would he do that? He’s obviously not going to play tennis with it because it’s a kids’ event, so he just wanted everyone to know yeah, I’m a tennis player myself, my son is a tennis player because I’m a tennis player, blah blah blah . . . My lifetime… Read more →
Another Argument Against Day Care
Cypress babysitter jailed after infant’s death — Orange County Register Read more →
Lightning Goes to the Beach
Which Way is the Finish?
From the Mighty Rubber Ducky Derby at Wild Rivers in Irvine: Originally uploaded by Spike in Irvine. Read more →
Unrequited Love
I fell in love with a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel at the Irvine dog park last night. I kept showing off, trying to get her to play with me, but she just wanted to sit by her owner. When they left, I sat and stared out at the parking lot for a while . . . P.S. I’m over it now though. — Lightning Read more →
The Overachiever
We’re celebrating my dad’s 70th birthday at Buca di Beppo in Brea. “How’s Casey doing in school?” my dad asks. “Is he a 4.0 student?” The boy, who’s sitting right there, says, “I’m a lot higher than that.” “How can you be higher than 4.0?” I ask him. “I’m an overachiever,” he says. “You’re an overachiever?” my dad says. “Yes, sir.” Read more →
Tequila!
Danny Flores, composer of “Tequila,” a huge hit for the Champs in 1958, has died. He was 77. — Orange County Register Flores died in Westminster, about 20 miles from where I live in Irvine. He had been suffering for years from Parkinson’s disease. He made about $70,000 a year from the European rights to “Tequila” but in one of those “seemed like a good idea at the time” moves that you kick yourself for later, he had long since signed away the rights to U.S. royalties, an error in judgment that the Register attributed to the fact that Flores was — wait for it — a heavy drinker in the early days of the band. Read more →