EppsNet Archive: The Onion

Sadly, Nation Knows Exactly How Colorado Shooting’s Aftermath Will Play Out

“The calls not to politicize the tragedy should be starting in an hour, but by 1:30 p.m. tomorrow the issue will have been politicized. Also, I wouldn’t be surprised if the shooter’s high school classmate is interviewed within 45 minutes.” “It’s like clockwork,” said Gerson, who sighed, shook his head, and walked away. — The Onion Read more →

Twitter: 2010-08-21

RT @capricecrane: “Spencer Pratt Writing Tell-All About Ex Heidi Montag.” Chapter One: She marries a douchebag. # RT @TheOnion: Obama To Create 17 New Jobs By Resigning And Finally Opening That Restaurant http://onion.com/a0V23H # Related articles Spencer Pratt to write tell-all book about ex Heidi Montag, as if we don’t already know everything (popwatch.ew.com) Read more →

Twitter: 2010-08-17

RT @jdickerson: Breaking News: Person unknown to you did something of dubious distinctIon or is no longer missing or married. # RT @joshcomers: "Everything’s going to be okay." (First lie to self of week). # RT @TheOnion: In Focus: Al-Jazeera Introduces 'Lighter Side Of The News' Segment http://onion.com/dknefU # RT @fredthompson: Obama warns GOP planning to privatize Soc Sec. Very… Read more →