February 2009

A Lesson in Trust

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The dog has a stuffed bear he likes to sleep with. Unfortunately, it’s now bedtime and we don’t know where the bear is. “Have you seen his bear?” I ask my wife. “I think he had it upstairs,” she says. “Either in our room or Casey’s room.” “Upstairs” and “bear” are two of the words the dog recognizes so he’s already charged upstairs and waiting for me on the top step. I walk up and ask him, “Where’s your bear?” He runs into my room. We look around in there and can’t find it so we go down the hall to the boy’s room where he’s sitting on the bed doing homework. I say to him, “Where is it, you bear-stealin’ varmint?” He gets up and walks out of the room. “Thanks for the help,” I call after him. “Come on, Lightning, we’ll conduct the search without him.” A few… Read more →

Living on the Edge

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I’ve just poured myself a Diet Pepsi when my son announces that diet sodas are unhealthy. “They add things to the diet sodas so they’re even more unhealthy than regular sodas.” I ask him, “What do they add?” “I didn’t get that far into it,” he says, “The article started to get boring.” “In that case, I’m going to go ahead and drink this thing.” Read more →

A Trade, Not a Steal

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We were watching the NBA All-Star Game yesterday when someone — Marv Albert, I think — said that Pau Gasol was acquired in a “steal” by the Los Angeles Lakers. My son takes exception. “That wasn’t a steal,” he says. “It was a trade. Javaris Crittenton is a very capable player.” Read more →

I Got a Passport

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I got my first passport yesterday. I can go anywhere! The world is my oyster! Although I really don’t like to travel . . . Some people get annoyed with me when I say that, including members of my own family. It doesn’t make sense to them. My mom, for example, has been to like 30 countries. Maybe 50, I can’t keep track. For me, I start out thinking I’d be happier somewhere else but after I’ve spent all the time and money to get there, I realize I’m still the same person with the same problems I had at home. Not to mention the possibility of being drugged, robbed and killed, or hit by a tsunami. I’m not saying there’s nothing positive about travel. It’s just not worth the investment . . . Read more →

Happy Valentine’s Day

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Who knew Carrie Fisher has a blog? — I happen to be the possessor of a very big personality . . . When I date someone, I generally have about three months of a personality available and then I finally come to the end of it. I need to refuel, I short-circuit. And then whoever I’m with shows up, and a lot of the times I don’t like him so much. Now wait, I just got a little quieter and what’d you just say? You didn’t read this? You’ve never seen that? You don’t know who that is? You really think that about me? He bothers me – not that I’m so great, but the enchantment wears off, and then the sleeping giant wakes up and says, “Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell the blood of someone dumb.” Read more →

The Art of the Possible

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The role of the economist in discussions of public policy seems to me to be to prescribe what should be done in light of what can be done, politics aside, and not to predict what is “politically feasible” and then to recommend it. — Milton Friedman Take out the references to economics and public policy and you can probably apply the “what should be done in light of what can be done” approach in your own work. It’s the art of the possible . . . Read more →

To Live and Die in Irvine

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IRVINE – A group of solemn people sat around tables at a fast-food Chinese restaurant off Jeffrey Road on Wednesday night after a man was shot and killed while sitting in a white Lexus parked behind the eatery. — OCRegister.com At least he died in a nice car. It’s Irvine, Jake! This happened a stone’s throw from my house. Well, more than a stone’s throw but let’s say a hard 5-iron with a good bounce off Trabuco Road. I’ve been to that Chinese restaurant many times. (It’s a dine-in restaurant, not a fast-food place, despite what the Register says.) Don’t worry about me though. Irvine is still the safest city in the country. That guy must have gotten himself mixed up in some kind of trouble . . . Read more →

A Lack of Foresight

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It’s chilly tonight in Orange County — temperatures in the low 40s — but the dog still needs to go out for a walk so I ask my son to please take care of it. “It’s kinda cold,” he says. “It’s okay,” I reply. “He’s got fur.” “I don’t have fur.” “You should have thought of that when you asked for a dog.” Read more →

Thomas Jefferson on the Stimulus Package

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The situation could not be more serious. It is inexcusable and irresponsible for any of us to get bogged down in distraction, delay or politics as usual while millions of Americans are being put out of work. Now is the time for Congress to act. — Barack Obama Bah-loney. The American economy will bounce back as it always has, as surely as day follows night, no matter what anyone does or doesn’t do. The only urgency in passing a stimulus bill (which doesn’t work, as I’ve explained previously) is so President Obama can take the credit for the recovery when it occurs . . . Read more →

Why Parents Do What They Do

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And I know a father who had a son He longed to tell him all the reasons for the things he’d done — Paul Simon, “Slip Sliding Away” This story needs a quick setup . . . My son’s two-year-old birthday party was a festive event. The whole neighborhood was there! We had a bounce house, a clown . . . the only thing that marred the day slightly was that as everyone sang “Happy Birthday,” his mom lifted him up so he could see the cake, and he stuck his finger out and touched a lit candle. It wasn’t a bad burn but he did cry for a while. We have a video of this. That’s why he remembers it. So — we’re having a late lunch today at Souplantation. A kid who looks about four years old runs down the aisle, turns the corner and runs back up… Read more →

Weeding Out Bruins on Facebook

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Wednesday was national signing day for college football. Looks like UCLA got a good group of kids. One of my Facebook friends, a UCLA grad, updated his status to say that he thinks UCLA will now rule the city in basketball AND football. I posted a comment on his status: What about SAT scores? And within minutes he had dropped me from his friend list, after sending me an angry email saying that USC is getting smart kids internationally and out of state while UCLA has to take California kids and besides that they’re manipulating the stats and blah blah blah . . . To fully appreciate that, you need to know that traditionally the perception has been that the rich SoCal kids go to USC while the smart kids go to UCLA. In recent years though, USC has moved ahead in SAT scores, GPA, National Merit Scholars, etc., and… Read more →

Whatever Helps

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It was after 11 p.m. last night. I was already in bed but my son was still downstairs doing homework. He’s got a hockey game tonight in Huntington Beach and he wanted to work ahead a little bit. Then I heard: “WOOOOOOO! WAAAAAAAH! BABABABABABABABABABABABABA!” I got up, went out to the stairs and yelled down, “What are you DOING?” “It’s my homework war cry!” he yelled back. Hmmm — having a homework war cry actually sounds like a pretty good idea to me so I let the matter slide and went back to bed . . . Read more →

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