As I was walking up to the local supermarket, one of the cart wranglers was near the entrance saying — loudly — “Number one! Eyewitness News!”
Now this is a grown man, of what looked like Middle Eastern extraction, although that’s not really relevant.
As I got closer, he asked me, “Have you heard that?”
“I don’t watch the news,” I said. “It’s depressing, It’s dishonest. It’s the same things happening every day: A car chase on the freeway, someone got killed, someone got robbed, someone got stabbed on the Metro, a boy wearing makeup won a girls’ track meet.”
“I love the news,” he said. “I’d like to be a reporter.”
If anyone reading this is looking to hire a challenged but enthusiastic reporter, message me.
I exited the store through the other door, where two young people had a table set up, selling stuffed animals to benefit the SPCA.
“Ixnay,” I said.
I can’t say for sure that they weren’t affiliated with the SPCA . . . they did have matching orange T-shirts . . . but I’ve worked with legitimate non-profit organizations, we did fundraising of course, but we didn’t do it by standing outside supermarkets.
