Success will never be a big step in the future; success is a small step taken just now. — Jonatan Mårtensson

What Are the Laker Girls Going to Do?

 

The Laker Girls 2011 squad has been selected. (You can watch the auditions.) But with no Laker games, what are they going to do?

Idea: Come over to the office, stand behind me all day and dance around every time I school someone.

“Bob, let me be direct. Your idea has one problem. It’s stupid.”

OHHHHHHH! Loud music! Dancing! Cheering!

Whitewater Adventures are for Pussies, or: A Rube in a Tube

 

A man from West Plains, Mo., has been found dead floating in the Meramec River after he disappeared from a tubing trip.

Gregory L. Spurling, 55, was pronounced dead at about 12:50 a.m. Monday in Crawford County.

Kudos to Gregory L. Spurling, formerly of West Plains, Mo. — a real American!

Frankly, I’m sick of these soft yuppie bastards who pay big money for “whitewater adventures” and pass themselves off as thrillseekers.

Those trips are no more dangerous than a raft ride at Disney World.

Riding down a river in an inner tube — now that’s excitement! You might die! Especially if your judgment’s been impaired by the consumption of alcohol.

Don’t forget the sunscreen!

Your Time is Limited

 

Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

Saying No to 1,000 Things

 

[Innovation] comes from saying no to 1,000 things to make sure we don’t get on the wrong track or try to do too much. We’re always thinking about new markets we could enter, but it’s only by saying no that you can concentrate on the things that are really important.

How to Make a Living as a Porn Actor

 

Marc Randazza, First Amendment lawyer who represents porn companies, said about porn: “Honestly, the gay side’s where all the money is. There might be 30 straight guys who can make a living at it, but if you’re willing to get f*cked in the ass, I can get you five grand right now.”

The Cheese Board

 
Anti-establishment types

Anti-establishment types

One of the highlights of our Berkeley visit was a trip to The Cheese Board for pizza.

We parked on a side street and when we walked around the corner I saw a line of people down the sidewalk.

“What’s that line?” I asked.

“That’s The Cheese Board,” my kid said. “Don’t worry, it goes fast.”

He explained that they only make one kind of pizza per day — always vegetarian — so all you can do is order a slice, a half pizza or a whole pizza and be on your way.

Yesterday’s selection was fresh corn, feta cheese, mozzarella, and cilantro pesto.

Because they serve so fast and the shop is small, there’s not not enough room for all the patrons, many of whom repair to the median on Shattuck Ave. and enjoy their pizza in the shade of the Keep Off Median signs.

Move-In Weekend

 
Waiting in line for room assignment

It’s Sunday night. We moved the boy in yesterday, had dinner with him tonight, and tomorrow morning, we’re going home without him.

I’ve had some emotional ups and downs this weekend as I cross the gulf between youth and old age. I almost cried five or six times.

I feel great about Berkeley. It’s a college town all the way. Men, women and children are decked out in Cal gear for miles around.

We live in Irvine, which also has a UC campus, but it’s not the same atmosphere at all. “That’s because no one wants to go to UC Irvine,” the boy said.

I feel good that he already knows some people. His best friend from high school is his dorm roommate. We met a couple of other high school classmates, one at a pizza place and one in the parking lot of the guest house. We met friends of friends, brothers and sisters of friends . . .

I feel good that the boy is not the same kind of mopey misfit that I was at his age. That’s really what I feel the best about. He’s polite and confident and his confidence rubs off on me that he’ll be able to handle things.

We dropped him off at the dorm tonight after dinner. I’ve been saying things to him for 18 years, and I couldn’t think of anything to say to him that I hadn’t already said.

I hugged him one last time and he went inside . . .

A Sound Sleeper

 

A girl who’s going to be a senior at Northwood came over to the house this morning to borrow my son’s AP U.S. History study guide. He took the class last year.

This alarm clock is better

Last night, he told his mom to wake him up at 8:30.

At 9 this morning, there was a knock on the front door. The boy pulled on a baseball cap, took out his retainer, pasted a big smile on his face and answered it.

He gave the book to the girl and she gave him a doughnut.

When she left, he went back to bed.

“Wake me up at 11:30,” he said to his mom.

“What are you going to do in college when I’m not there to wake you up?” she asked.

“I’ll be fine.”

His mom and I have been waking him up for 18 years.

The past few days, he’s started setting an alarm on his iPhone that sounds like the dive alarm on a submarine. It wakes me up on the opposite side of the house through a closed door, but he’s slept right through it twice. He’s a sound sleeper.

The first time it woke me up, I thought it was a car alarm, then I realized it was coming from inside the house. I walked down to his room and he was sleeping with the alarm going off less than a foot from his face.

I’m not worried about him waking up for class though. That alarm is going to wake up the entire dorm, so one way or another, he’s going to wake up.

Web Governance: Becoming an Agent of Change

 

It’s about pointing out risks, shining a light on organizational denial, overcoming resistance, and facilitating constructive discussions about change. . . .

We’re facing a stark choice right now: keep whining or start leading. . . .

You might be thinking: “There’s no way I can do this. I’m a designer, developer, or copywriter, not an organizational change maker!” But we can do it, and we should. Because nobody else will do it for us, and if nobody deals with the problem, we won’t be able to do great work.