Instead of “managing” the process in the traditional sense, management can help a lot more by:
- realizing that it is the teams that will discover and make the improvements, not management,
- giving teams the responsibility to manage and improve their own process as well as the freedom and authority to do so,
- establishing an environment that actively encourages teams to be totally honest about their problems and impediments,
- listening to what the teams say they need and respond to those needs,
- observing teams in action instead of just collecting numbers,
- providing useful feedback to teams instead of instructions or pressure.
The Peanuts Kids: Where Are They Now?
ANAHEIM — Authorities say a woman apparently jumped off an Anaheim freeway overpass Thursday and died. The Orange County Register reports that 50-year-old Sally Brown plunged to her death just after 11 a.m. from the East La Palma Avenue overpass onto the westbound 91 Freeway.
EppsNet’s Greatest Love Songs: I Can’t Explain
Why it’s great: Love makes you hot, cold, dizzy, happy, mad . . . I can’t explain it . . .
Got a feeling inside (Can’t explain)
It’s a certain kind (Can’t explain)
I feel hot and cold (Can’t explain)
Yeah, down in my soul, yeah (Can’t explain)I said … (Can’t explain)
I’m feeling good now, yeah, but (Can’t explain)Dizzy in the head and I’m feeling blue
The things you’ve said, well, maybe they’re true
I’m gettin’ funny dreams again and again
I know what it means, but …Can’t explain
I think it’s love
Try to say it to you
When I feel blueBut I can’t explain (Can’t explain)
Yeah, hear what I’m saying, girl (Can’t explain)Dizzy in the head and I’m feeling bad
The things you’ve said have got me real mad
I’m gettin’ funny dreams again and again
I know what it means butCan’t explain
I think it’s love
Try to say it to you
When I feel blueBut I can’t explain (Can’t explain)
Forgive me one more time, now (Can’t explain)I said I can’t explain, yeah
You drive me out of my mind
Yeah, I’m the worrying kind, babe
I said I can’t explain
Lightning on the Balcony
Why TV Shows Are So Stupid
Welcome to EppsNet, where the writers are not on strike!
Striking writers are stupid. Pretend you’re a TV executive and your writers are on strike.
Oh dear! What will I do? I’ll have to show reruns and only get 90 percent of the dimbulb audience I’d get showing new episodes. Boo hoo hoo! ![]()
Television is the opiate of the masses, man! People will watch it no matter what’s on. They can’t live without it.
We’ve got TVs in restaurants, health clubs, cars, you name it. They’re ubiquitous!
The number of people like me — who think that if you want to eat dinner in front of a TV set you should stay the hell at home — is very small compared to the number of people who will not leave their homes if it means being separated from a television.
Hey scribes! People are going to turn off their flat-panel LCD high-def TVs — and do what? Read a book? Interact with their families?
Fat fucking chance!
Writers can stay on strike forever for all anybody cares.
That’s why TV shows are so stupid. They’re written by stupid people.
This just in
Stars Won’t Attend Golden Globe Awards
Golden Globe-nominated actors and presenters won’t attend the televised award show Jan. 13 because of the writers’ strike, the Screen Actors Guild announced Friday.
Well then . . . that casts things in a whole new light! Actors will not attend the Golden Globes because they’d have to cross a picket line of angry wordsmiths and ink slingers.
OMG! I hope the earth doesn’t stop revolving on its axis and fling us all into space because actors are boycotting the Golden Globes telecast!
What are the Golden Globes anyway? Another excuse for actors to get together and suck each other’s dicks?
Rot in hell, thespians!
Remembrance of Things Past
Here’s an email that went out to everyone in the office this morning:
Good Morning Everyone!
There was a clip on earring turned in to the receptionists desk this morning. Please come and claim it if it is yours! :o)
Happy Friday….
A clip-on earring!!! I thought those went out with hula hoops and pay phones. Who will claim it, I wonder? Is Marion Davies in the building? Gloria Swanson?
Rick Neuheisel
UCLA has hired Rick Neuheisel as its new football coach, replacing Karl Dorrell.
UCLA people love this guy. They’ve been blowing Neuheisel’s meat whistle ever since the announcement.
As a USC man, I say this: Great hire!
Neuheisel will fail for all of the reasons listed here. Excerpt: “Neuheisel’s one great genius turns out to be his ability to make people think he’s a genius.”
FIGHT ON!
Rose Bowl 2008: USC 49, Illinois 17
The conventional wisdom in recent years has been that USC has trouble defending spread offenses and mobile quarterbacks, like Illinois’ Juice Williams.
I’m not sure that’s true. They’ve had trouble defending some mobile quarterbacks — Vince Young, Dennis Dixon — but so has every other team in the country.
We took it to a real personal nature because we wanted to figure the spread-thing out, defend it really well and take the mystery out of it. We practiced so beautifully that it had to work out well. That’s a big deal. A really big deal.
FIGHT ON!
CFNM
I like to think I’m up to speed on my acronyms, abbreviations and fetishes, but CFNM is a new one on me.
No, I’m not going to hyperlink it — this is a family-oriented website — but go ahead and Google it if you want to . . .
Rose Parade 2008
A few years ago, my son went to the Rose Parade as a spectator. This year, he worked as a volunteer float decorator with a community service group from his high school.
They worked on the City of St. Louis float, which won the President’s Trophy for most effective floral use and presentation. Yeah, I know pretty much every float wins some kind of trophy, but the President’s Trophy is one of the good trophies.
To give you the flavor of the thing, here’s the list of “suggestions” given to volunteers by the float-building company:
- PLEASE DO NOT BRING RADIOS, WALKMENS, CAMERAS, HANDBAGS OR JEWELRY. BRING YOUR I.D. AND MONEY ONLY. FANNY PACKS WORK GREAT.
- WEAR OLD BUT WARM CLOTHING AND STURDY SHOES WITH CLOSED TOE AND HEEL. TIE BACK LONG HAIR.
- FIRE LANE MUST BE KEPT OPEN AT ALL TIMES AND THE AREA AROUND THE FLOAT SHOULD BE KEPT CLEAN.
- PLEASE DO NOT EXPECT TO USE THE OFFICE PHONES. THERE ARE PAY PHONES LOCATED OUTSIDE THE NORTH DOOR FOR YOUR USE. INCOMING CALLS WIL NOT BE ACCEPTED FOR WORKERS AND NO PAGING WILL BE ALLOWED FROM THE OFFICE. WE WILL TAKE EMERGENCY CALLS ONLY. [Pay phones . . . how quaint! — PE]
- NO ONE IS ALLOWED INSIDE THE BUILDING DURING JUDGING. WHEN YOU ARE ASKED TO STEP OUTSIDE PLEASE DO SO PROMPTLY AND REMEMBER TO TAKE OUT ANY PERSONAL ITEMS WITH YOU.
- ALL BREAKS ARE TO BE TAKEN OUTSIDE.
- VOLUNTEERS ARE HERE TO WORK. THERE WILL BE SOME NOT-SO-GLAMOROUS JOBS THAT NEED TO BE DONE BESIDES DECORATING; IT ALL HAS TO BE DONE.
- NO SMOKING IS ALLOWED IN THE BUILDINGS.
- NO MORE THAN 3 PEOPLE ARE ALLOWED ON SCAFFOLDING AT A TIME.
- DO NOT WEAR FLOWERS AT ANY TIME, EVEN AFTER THE FLOATS HAVE LEFT THE BUILDING.
- PLEASE SIGN-IN WITH YOUR CREW CHIEF WHEN YOU ARRIVE AT YOUR FLOAT AND WHEN YOU LEAVE. SIGN-IN SHEETS ARE COLLECTED DAILY.
- HAVE FUN!!
Playing the Expert Game
If . . .
- you are able to get important things done
- you are seen learning things on your own
- you are seen trying to do things even if you aren’t sure how
- you share freely the things that you know
- you don’t hide your ignorance, but also don’t rest on it
- you honor what other people know
- you know more often than not how to find out what you don’t know
- you know how to ask for help
- you offer to help people on their own terms
Then . . .
- no one will care whether you succeed by learning or succeed by already knowing
- no one will care if you mess up occasionally because they assume you learn from it
- no one will mind if you forget (or don’t know) any given fact or method at any given time
- you will be treated as if you’re smart and useful, even though everyone knows you have a lot to learn
Happy New Year 2008
Torvalds on Specs
A “spec” is close to useless. I have _never_ seen a spec that was both big
enough to be useful _and_ accurate.And I have seen _lots_ of total crap work that was based on specs. It’s
_the_ single worst way to write software, because it by definition means
that the software was written to match theory, not reality.So there’s two MAJOR reasons to avoid specs:
– they’re dangerously wrong. Reality is different, and anybody who thinks
specs matter over reality should get out of kernel programming NOW.
When reality and specs clash, the spec has zero meaning. Zilch. Nada.
None.It’s like real science: if you have a theory that doesn’t match
experiments, it doesn’t matter _how_ much you like that theory. It’s
wrong. You can use it as an approximation, but you MUST keep in mind
that it’s an approximation.– specs have an inevitably tendency to try to introduce abstractions
levels and wording and documentation policies that make sense for a
written spec. Trying to implement actual code off the spec leads to the
code looking and working like CRAP.The classic example of this is the OSI network model protocols. Classic
spec-design, which had absolutely _zero_ relevance for the real world.
We still talk about the seven layers model, because it’s a convenient
model for _discussion_, but that has absolutely zero to do with any
real-life software engineering. In other words, it’s a way to _talk_
about things, not to implement them.And that’s important. Specs are a basis for _talking_about_ things. But
they are _not_ a basis for implementing software.So please don’t bother talking about specs. Real standards grow up
_despite_ specs, not thanks to them.
Another Difference Between Dogs and Cats
PULLMAN, Wash. — A 6-year-old border collie died in a house fire after waking up his owner out of a deep sleep to warn her of the blaze.
Marilyn Harvey and her son, Brent, rushed out the basement door, but Sandler turned back. Marilyn’s husband, John Harvey, who was in Seattle at the time of the fire, thinks it was because Sandler wanted to save the family’s 17-year-old Australian shepherd, who was still inside the house.
Both dogs died in last Friday’s fire, along with a bird named Kellogg. A cat named Raja escaped unharmed.
Pug and Chihuahua

Originally uploaded by Studio 950.
Lightning on the Balcony
Blame Roger Goodell
My son’s explanation to his mom on why he can’t turn off Madden 2008 like she asked him to:
I can’t stop in the middle of a game. Roger Goodell has not sent me a notice that we can do that. Unless there’s a weather delay or fans throwing things on the field, which there isn’t, so that can’t happen.
Schedule Crunching
Many wise people have said that what you put your attention on is what you will create around you. This is true in project management. If you concentrate on meeting the plan and slipping when big problems arise, you will, at best, ship on time, and more likely, you will ship late. . . .
To change your results by changing the way you look at how your team uses time, you must put your attention on how to make tasks take the least time possible. Replace “sticking to the plan” with “looking for ways to decrease the time spent.”
A Christmas Story
One of the cable stations had a 24-hour A Christmas Story marathon. I’ve never understood the mania some people have about this movie. I mean, it’s a nice movie, but 12 consecutive showings?!
Anyway, my son turned on the 10 p.m. showing last night and we all watched it. My wife fell asleep as she often does watching movies, but the boy enjoyed it.
Merry Christmas to everyone who’s taken the time to read this site over the past year.
Informed Consent
I work in the IT department of a health care organization. I’ve noticed before that health care professionals are much better than IT professionals when it comes to setting the expectations of customers.
Last week, I found a handbook around the office called Risk Prevention Skills: Communication and Record Keeping in Clinical Practice. Substitute “customers” for “patients” and “software development” for “medical care” and you can apply the same advice to IT:
Some patients are unreasonable in their expectations of medical care. . . . If a complication does occur, the patient or family with unreasonable expectations will usually conclude that someone must have done something wrong and should be blamed. The only way to correct unreasonable expectations is to accurately explain to the patient, before care is provided, what problems may be encountered.
An accurate description of the range and likelihood of possible outcomes, and the reasons why an unsatisfactory result can occur, may be the most important elements of an informed consent.





