EppsNet Archive: Women

Angry Illiterates Shouldn’t Work at Bookstores

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There’s no one behind the customer service counter at Barnes and Noble but there is a woman doing something with the books in front of the counter . . . “Do you work here?” I ask. “Yes,” she says, but not in a friendly way . . . more like yes, I work here but I regret it. ‘I’m looking for The Book of Holiday Awesome,” I say. “I’ve never heard of that,” she says. I don’t care if she’s heard of it. I just want to know if they have a copy of it on hand. “Do you know the author?” she asks. “No.” She types a couple of things into the computer. “Nothing is coming up,” she says. It’s a popular book so something should be coming up, even if it’s just to say they don’t have it in stock. I lean over the counter to see what… Read more →

Don’t Make Me Laugh

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A new study says that men are funnier than women — but just barely. — latimes.com Men are a lot funnier on average, a few women are very funny, and women who have a reputation of being funny, like Lucille Ball or Carol Burnett, are usually not funny at all. Read more →

The Most Interesting Man in the World?

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UPLAND, Pa. (AP) — Two pregnant women were allegedly involved in a fight in which one slashed two other people inside a Philadelphia-area hospital room. Upland police say the pregnant women, ages 21 and 22, were fighting with a woman and a teenage girl inside a room at Crozer-Chester Medical Center on Tuesday afternoon. Upland police Chief John Easton says the women were all visiting a male patient who is recovering from a gunshot wound. — Police: Pregnant Woman Slashes 2 Inside Crozer-Chester Medical Center « CBS Philly Read more →

Thomas Jefferson on Weinergate

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Rep. Weiner of New York — one of the 13 original colonies — has been sending photos of his penis to women in Texas, Washington and other points west. When I was president, Texas and Washington weren’t even part of the country, and if I wanted to show a woman my dick, she had to be right there in the room with me.1 And still there are some misfits who insist that there is no such thing as progress. Yes, I could have made a sketch and sent it through the mail but that could take weeks. Read more →

Twitter: 2011-01-26

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RT @yoyoha: Every woman has a tiny ball of hatred in her heart that is fed by the actions of everyone around them. # RT @capricecrane: Is there a “Your Kid Looks The Same As Yesterday” button on Facebook? # RT @yoyoha: I’m currently eating graham crackers in the shape of little bunnies. This can’t be helping my street cred. # Read more →

The Most Promiscuous Women

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The most promiscuous women are those who have been punched, believe homosexuality is not wrong, and spend time in bars. The least promiscuous women are those who are patriotic and spend time in church. — Steven Landsburg Read more →

Twitter: 2010-07-01

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RT @capricecrane: MSNBC: "Up to 80 percent of women admit faking it." That is a good headline. So good. SOOO GOOOD. YES! # RT @eddiepepitone: Small town america is nice- a lot of obesity but everybody waves. # Read more →

Why Tiger Woods Gets All the Girls

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I get home from the gym and say to my wife, “I’m in such great physical condition, it’s a shame I’m not having an affair with 10 women like Tiger Woods.” “Women care about money,” she says. “You don’t have 10 billion dollars so forget it.” “Oh. Okay.” Read more →

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