We may work more hours at our jobs without realizing that the childhood of our sons and daughters is slipping away. Sometimes these doors close too slowly for us to see them vanishing. — Dan Ariely Read more →
Author Archive: Paul Epps
Waterfall: The USSR of Software
Think of waterfall as being similar in concept to the old USSR central planning of the economy. Think of Scrum as similar to a market economy. — Ken Schwaber Read more →
The Customer is NOT Always Right
Great sequence of posts on the scrumdevelopment Yahoo group . . . Person A says the number one rule of business is that the customer is always right. Person B says the customer is NOT always right, like his customer who wants an auction system like eBay on a budget of $1,500. Person A says Person B needs to shut up and listen to the customer. Person B says I AM listening. They want something like Ebay for $1500. They want me to build a full Ebay clone this weekend and then tweak it until they’re happy over the next two weeks. I have listened carefully and diligently and have confirmed multiple times. This is definitely what they want. They’d also like time travel, but they don’t need that until April. The point I’m making is that there are many reasons why just listening to your customer and giving them… Read more →
Finding the Core
Shared vision as the DNA of an organization . . . It’s common knowledge that Southwest is a successful company, but there is a shocking performance gap between Southwest and its competitors. Although the airlines industry as a whole has only a passing acquaintance with profitability, Southwest has been consistently profitable for more than thirty years. The reasons for Southwest’s success could (and do) fill up books, but perhaps the single greatest factor in the company’s success is its dogged focus on reducing costs. Every airline would love to reduce costs, but Southwest has been doing it for decades. For this effort to succeed, the company must coordinate thousands of employees ranging from marketers to baggage handlers. Southwest has a Commander’s Intent, a core, that helps to guide this coordination. As related by James Carville and Paul Begala: Herb Kelleher [the longest-serving CEO of Southwest] once told someone, “I can… Read more →
Well Played, Sir
I’m waiting in line at Trader Joe’s while the checkout guy engages the woman in front of me in a conversation about her groceries, her occupation, where she went to school . . . it’s not even a particularly long conversation in terms of elapsed time . . . the guy just talks so fast that he’s able to cover a lot of ground. Personally, I don’t like conversing with service personnel unless they’re attractive women, and even then I don’t like it that much. OK, my turn. The first item out of the basket is a package of dog chews. “What kind of dog do you have,” the guy asks. I decide to try a little verbal jiu jitsu and say “We don’t have a dog. You ever try those things? They’re really good.” It doesn’t even slow him down. “Do they clean your teeth?” he asks. “I bet… Read more →
William F Buckley Jr: 1925-2008
Once upon a time there was a political observer who was thoughtful, intelligent, witty and polite, not an angry demagogue. I know, it sounds like a fairy tale . . . Read more →
Overheard
Best and Worst Software Features of the Week
I was typing in Microsoft Word and I started a bulleted list with an item like this: Topic1. A sentence about Topic1. And another one. Then I hit the Enter key. What do you think happened? Not only did I get another bulleted list item, Word set the font to bold! So I typed this: Topic2. And as soon as I typed the period, Word turned bold off!! Not only did it figure out that I’m creating a bulleted list, it figured out that I’m starting each bullet with bold font, followed by a period, followed by more text in regular font, and it takes care of everything for me automatically! That’s pretty sophisticated. Compare that to Lotus Notes, which can’t even figure out when I hit Enter twice that I want to turn the bullets off! We use Notes at work and I swear to God, if I type… Read more →
Lotus Notes Sucks
I’m working with a company that uses Lotus Notes. It’s been more than 10 years since I’ve had to use Notes and it’s as bad as ever. It’s probably the worst piece of software ever released by a major company. The worst feature — well, it’s hard to pick a worst feature, but one of the worst features — because I have to deal with it dozens of times a day — is the way Notes makes me reply to email. I can’t just click Reply and start typing. When I click Reply, I get a dropdown list of options and have to select one: – Reply – Reply with History – Reply without Attachment(s) – Reply with Internet-Style History The godawful thing about this is that default options for email work 100 percent of the time. I always want to reply with history and without attachments, so why give… Read more →
Dinner Conversation
“The boy I started tutoring in algebra a couple weeks ago,” I say, “his mom told me he got a C on his last test.” “You’re fired,” my son says. My wife stares at me in disbelief for a few seconds. Finally she says, “That’s not your fault. You can only do so much in one hour a week.” “Actually,” I say, “she thought that was great. It all depends on your expectations.” Read more →
The Average Software Developer
The average software developer reads less than one professional book per year (not including manuals) and subscribes to no professional magazines. These developers are not developing or advancing themselves professionally. About 75% of these people do not have a degree in computer science or a related field. They learn by trial-and-error and on-the-job training, which means that they risk learning other people’s bad habits rather than industry best practices. This method of professional development perpetuates ineffective, inefficient practices that hinder the success of software projects. — Construx.com Read more →
Wasted Years
My 14-year-old son informs me that he is not “wasting his years” the way I am . . . “Is that what I’m doing?” I ask. “‘Wasting my years’? How am I wasting my years? Taking care of you?” “My years are fully utilized and non-refundable,” he says. “You’re a schmo.” “Meanwhile, you’re wasting your years, calling people schmoes.” Read more →
Changing Requirements
The most common reason for software project failure is attributed to requirements issues – badly defined, not stated correctly, changing requirements, etc. — “Tips for Discovering Requirements” Any project I’ve done that lasted longer than a day had changing requirements. If your development strategy only works with an unchanging set of requirements, you need to rethink your approach . . . Read more →
Trash by Any Other Name
Sometimes it’s hard to tell if boxes, etc., sitting around the office are supposed to go out with the trash. In Southern California, you’ll often see BASURA written on these things because the probability that a Spanish-speaking person will be taking out the trash is high. We couldn’t seem to get this box removed by writing BASURA on it, so one of our tech support people came up with this sign . . . Read more →
I Have a Dream About Bananas
“Look at the color of this banana,” my son says as he takes it out of the refrigerator. “It’s black.” “I think it’s still okay,” I tell him. “It’s not the color of the skin that’s important . . .” ” . . . it’s the content of its character,” he jumps in. Read more →
Overheard
Be careful what you wish for . . . Read more →
The Competition: A Sonnet
“Get off,” my wife says — but the pug Just looks at her and doesn’t move. He’s lying in his favorite spot Beside his master on the couch. “Off,” she says — the dog just stares; He could win a test of wills But when she moves to pick him up He concedes defeat and jumps. “I want to sit there,” she explains. He looks at her, he looks at me Then jumps up from the other side, Lying down across my lap Sideways, facing down his foe As if to say “Your move.” Read more →
Changes of Life
My wife asks our son, “Why do you have to argue about everything?” “I’m stubborn,” he says. “It’s all part of puberty.” “Well, I’m getting old,” she says, “and part of that is I’m not going to put up with a lot of nonsense.” Read more →
Wives of Spanking Husbands Club
From the front page of the Los Angeles Times 70 years ago today, Jan. 26, 1938: Wives of Spanking Husbands Form Girls’ Auxiliary to Club SIOUX FALLS (S. D.) Jan. 25 (AP) — Wives of Spanking Husbands’ Club, organized in Sioux City, Iowa, and parent organization of fifty-nine such clubs throughout the nation according to its own figures–reached out for another slice of territory today. The Iowa housewives who consider it a mark of esteem for their husbands to wield a disciplinary hairbrush once in a while, announced plans today for a junior auxiliary–Daughters of Spanking Parents. ELIGIBLE GIRLS A letter received here from Sioux City and signed “Rita Rae, general delivery,” told of plans for the new organization for which she claimed an initial membership of seventeen. Any girl above the age of 11 years is eligible to join, Mrs. Rae wrote. “We think all parents should spank their… Read more →
Don’t Waste Your 15 Minutes of Fame
[Heath] Ledger’s ex-fiancée Michelle Williams and their two year old daughter Matilda flew from a film set in Sweden to their home in Brooklyn following the tragedy. . . . Her father Larry Williams said: “It has just broken everybody’s heart in my family. I think Tennyson got it right in the poem he described someone as having died at a young age but burning the candles at both ends. And oh what a beautiful flame he made. That was Heath. “The saddest thing is his daughter whom he just loved dearly. The Tennyson poem is just so true. His years were few but he left a beautiful legacy.” — Daily Mail Okay . . . Tennyson?! Tennyson did write In Memoriam A.H.H. about a friend who died young, but the candle poem was written by Edna St. Vincent Millay: My candle burns at both ends; It will not last… Read more →