tweets of a bomb defuser #4- Okay stand back everyone, I have developed Parkinsons and had a fight with the wife this morning..stand back..
Tweets of a Bomb Defuser
Angered by Trivia
people are strange: they are constantly angered by
trivial things,
but on a major matter
like
totally wasting their lives,
they hardly seem to
notice . . .
I’m All About Safety
The woman in the car next to me was talking on a cell phone while driving. I was so incensed, I ran her off the highway. Her car flew into a barranca and exploded in a giant fireball.
I’m a stickler when it comes to traffic safety.
Mexican Vacation Bargains
My boss is vacationing in Cabo San Lucas next week. With all the Mexican killings in the news recently, I hope he got a good deal on the room.
¡Olé!
Don’t Touch My Stuff
“Anyone who knows me as well as you do,” I say to my son, “knows that one thing I really hate is when I put something in one place and somebody moves it to a different place, so the next time I need that thing I can’t find it. Which brings me to the topic of the DVD remote . . .”
“I put it to the left of the TV,” he says.
“Are you sure you didn’t put it behind the TV where no one would be likely to find it?”
“Did you find it?” he asks.
“No — Mom found it, and when I asked her where she found it she pointed behind the TV.”
“Hmmm . . . I would say it was to the left of the TV.”
“Let me ask you this: Why did you move it at all?”
“It was in my chair.”
“That’s not ‘your chair.’ You don’t have a chair.”
The Importance of Doing Meaningful Work
Over the course of each academic term, he asks undergraduate and graduate business students three questions:
- A year out of this program what do you expect your job will be?
- What kind of job contributes the most to general well-being?
- Practicality aside, if you could be doing anything 10 years from now, what would it be?
What’s striking is that there is almost no overlap among the students’ answers to these questions. . . .
The question then becomes: Why are students studying so hard and paying so much to reach objectives that are neither what they dream of nor what they think of as especially responsible?
A Bad Combination
Happy St. Patrick’s Day
I’m not wearing green today — because I’m a dog. Don’t try to pinch me or I’ll bite you.
— Lightning 
Twitter: 2010-03-15
- The soul of man is a far country, which cannot be approached or explored. — Heraclitus #
Twitter: 2010-03-13
- RT @margaretcho: Remember gomer pyle was a good cook and had a beautiful singing voice? I'm a lot like him. #
Less Like Waiters
Software professionals need to behave more like doctors and less like waiters. Stop taking orders and start helping.
How to Speak Dog
This is how to say “step away from the bone”: GRRRRRRRR!
OK, enough academics! Here’s a cartoon I really like:
— Lightning
Twitter: 2010-03-12
- How to Stay Stressed http://goo.gl/RW1D #
Twitter: 2010-03-11
- C. L. Max Nikias Named 11th President of USC: http://bit.ly/9qgs5c #
Ode to a Nightingale
Already with thee! tender is the night . . .
. . . But here there is no light,
Save what from heaven is with the breezes blown
Through verdurous glooms and winding mossy ways.
Hockey Practice Will Never Be Cancelled
Under no circumstances will hockey practice ever be cancelled. Ever. Even on days when school is cancelled, practice is still on. A game may be cancelled due to inclement weather because of travel concerns for the visiting team, but it would have to rain razor blades and bocce balls to cancel hockey practice at your local rink. It’s good karma to respect the game.
Retirement Planning
Pig in a Poke
Pig-in-a-poke is an idiom that refers to a confidence trick originating in the Late Middle Ages, when meat was scarce but cats were not.
The scheme entailed the sale of a suckling pig in a poke (bag). The wriggling bag would actually contain a cat (not particularly prized as a source of meat) that was sold to the victim in an unopened bag.
A common colloquial expression in the English language, to buy a pig in a poke is to make a risky purchase without inspecting the item beforehand. The phrase can also be applied to accepting an idea or plan without a full understanding of its basis.
Nancy Pelosi: “But we have to pass the [health care] bill so that you can find out what is in it.”
Twitter: 2010-03-10
- RT @eddiepepitone: Zagat's guide: best mental institution is Creedmore. Their chicken a la king will drive you nuts-great game room as well. #
Twitter: 2010-03-09
- RT @Aimee_B_Loved: Katherine Bigelow really needs to end her speech with "SUCK IT, JAMES CAMERON!" #
- RT @letwits: CBSNews
"Hollywood Sees a Bright Future in 3D"
Sure they do. They can remake everything all over again. #