My wife is talking about the possibility of a Christmastime family trip to Thailand. She’s from Thailand, lived there through college, and still has relatives there. I’ve never been to Thailand — I hate to travel, for one thing — but our son has been over there with her on a few occasions. Here’s his reaction, punctuated with frantic screaming: “AHHHHH! It’s people who can’t speak English in 170-degree heat!” I don’t think this boy has a future as a travel agent. “They haven’t seen you in a long time,” my wife tells him. “Can’t we do a video conference?” Read more →
Author Archive: Paul Epps
Blessed Art Thou
In case you don’t recognize the woman in the painting, it’s Angelina Jolie (as the Virgin Mary) with her kids, hovering in the heavens above a Wal-Mart. Read more →
Fear in the Workplace
Perhaps most surprising to us has been the degree to which fear appears to be a feature of modern work life. Whenever we talk with others about this work, such as on airplanes with strangers, we get a similar response — “Oh yeah, I can relate to wanting to speak up but biting my tongue.” It’s really a shame how much apparently untapped knowledge there is out there and how much pain and frustration results from this silence. That, too, has been somewhat surprising–that people are genuinely hurt and frustrated about their silence. This suggests that employees aren’t failing to provide ideas or input because they’ve “checked out” and just don’t care, but because of fear. — “Do I Dare Say Something?,” HBS Working Knowledge What is happening here? Let’s examine some possibilities: Some people are afraid to speak up under any circumstances and the workplace has nothing to do… Read more →
A Hug from Your Mom
Replacing an on-site customer with some use cases is about as effective as replacing a hug from your Mom with a friendly note. — Ron Jeffries Read more →
Rose Bowl Update
John David Booty’s 391 passing yards was the highest total ever for a USC quarterback in a bowl game. The USC song girl buttocks investigation has apparently been resolved. Read more →
LSU 41, Notre Dame 14
Brady Quinn and the rest of the Irish seniors wrapped up their college careers by doing what they do best: losing every big game they play, most of them badly. It was the ninth consecutive bowl loss for Notre Dame, setting a new NCAA record for ineptitude. Thank God they locked up Charlie Weis for 10 years, huh? As recently as last week, Weis was assuring everyone that he plans to be at Notre Dame for the duration. More of a threat than a promise at this point . . . See Also: How to be a Notre Dame Fan Read more →
USC 32, Michigan 18
So much for the Wolverines’ “We should have been in the National Championship game” argument. Kudos to J.D. Booty (391 yards, 4 TDs), who took a lot of criticism this season, had a mediocre first half, including a fumble, then came back after halftime and took over the game. I got some delayed gloating from a UCLA grad about denying USC a national championship shot. Let’s keep it simple: either you’re good enough to win a national championship or you’re not. The Trojans lost to Oregon State and UCLA. They weren’t good enough. Still, it’s better to go to the Rose Bowl and win it than to go to the Emerald Bowl and get your rear ends kicked by the 8th-place ACC team. And the victory over USC may be a mixed blessing for Bruin fans, who will now likely be stuck with Karl Dorrell for at least one more… Read more →
Pug Photos from Flickr
Originally uploaded by laserone. Originally uploaded by joborges. Originally uploaded by joborges. Originally uploaded by joborges. Read more →
College Pick ‘Em
I was mathematically eliminated from college bowl pick ’em at the office with 13 games left. The leader — an Indian gentleman — is 15-2. I’m 11-6, but there are only three games left where he and I picked a different winner. At least I’m ahead of the woman who picked the games based on which of the mascots would win in a fight. If I’d won the thing, I probably wouldn’t mention that I actually let my son pick the games, my only rule being that he had to pick USC in the Rose Bowl . . . Read more →
Call Me Kreskin
I preface some obvious remark to my son by saying “Call me Kreskin, but . . .” He jumps in and says, “OK, you’re crazy.” “I didn’t say ‘Call me crazy,’ I said ‘Call me Kreskin.” “You’re a kreskin.” “Kreskin,” I explain, “is a mind-reading guy. He makes predictions about things.” “Oh . . . then, you’re crazy.” Read more →
How Could We Lose to These Idiots?
As I sat in Northwood Pizza last night with my son’s roller hockey team, watching the last few minutes of Florida State’s 44-27 drubbing of UCLA, I was reminded of chess grandmaster Aron Nimzowitsch, who once, after losing a match, climbed on a table and shouted Why must I lose to this idiot? FIGHT ON! Read more →
Almost Famous
A friend of mine’s 13-year-old daughter will be appearing as an extra in an episode of My Name is Earl airing in a couple of months. I told my son, also 13, he should try to hook up with her before she gets too famous and the competiton heats up. He just made throat-cutting gestures and gagging noises, as he always does when the subject of the ladies comes up. Naturally, she’ll dump him as soon as she hits the big time, but that’s okay . . . I’ve got to believe that all these starlets put a lot more into pleasing their boyfriends before they were famous than they do now that a guy is lucky just to be with them in the first place . . . Read more →
A Family Secret
“Don’t buy us anything expensive for Christmas this year,” my mom says on the phone. “Save your money.” I diplomatically omit the fact that every year as the Yuletide approaches, my wife starts rummaging through the closets for things she doesn’t want, then wraps them up and gives them to my parents as Christmas presents. Read more →
Christmas in Australia
A christmas card from my brother-in-law, who lives with my wife’s sister and their two daughters outside Sydney: The sun is shining. The days are long and hot. We are in the first weeks of summer and the bush fires have just started. It must mean Christmas is just around the corner. Read more →
Useless Junk
I had three pieces of limestone on my desk, but I was terrified to find that they required to be dusted daily . . . and threw them out the window in disgust. Read more →
The Years Have Been Kind to Me
I was at the corporate office of a well-known company here in Irvine yesterday when I saw the name “Tim Jones” on one of the offices. “Hmmm,” I thought, “I used to work with a Tim Jones [not his real name] about 20 years ago. I wonder if it’s the same guy?” The door was closed, but I was able to peep through the glass as I walked by and saw what looked to be Tim Jones’ grandfather. It’s amazing how Tim Jones has fallen apart over the last 20 years while I myself have not aged a single day . . . Read more →
Waiting for the End of the World
While you’re waiting for the end of the world, have a look at this frightening interview, in which Jeff Stein, Congressional Quarterly‘s national security editor, talks to Silvestre Reyes (D-TX), incoming chairman of the House Intelligence Committee, about the major players in Islamic terrorism: Al Qaeda is what, I asked, Sunni or Shia? “Al Qaeda, they have both,” Reyes said. “You’re talking about predominately [sic]?” “Sure,” I said, not knowing what else to say. “Predominantly — probably Shiite,” he ventured. He couldn’t have been more wrong. Al Qaeda is profoundly Sunni. If a Shiite showed up at an al Qaeda club house, they’d slice off his head and use it for a soccer ball. That’s because the extremist Sunnis who make up al Qaeda consider all Shiites to be heretics. Al Qaeda’s Sunni roots account for its very existence. Osama bin Laden and his followers believe the Saudi Royal family… Read more →
You Can Have My Job
A co-worker — let’s call him Mr. Frick — in response to criticism from Mr. Frack, says, “You want my job, Frack? You can have it!” To which Frack responds, “OK. I’ve been doing it for a while now.” Read more →
Why Craigslist Doesn’t Have Text Ads
The privately held Craigslist has been approached about installing text ads on the site, and the potential revenue is “quite staggering,” [CEO Jim Buckmaster] said. But, Buckmaster deadpanned, “No users are suggesting we run text ads.” — Associated Press Craigslist is an exception to the rule that a lot of Internet companies talk about putting users first, but when it comes down to a tradeoff between what users want and a boatload of money, they go for the money. Read more →
Choosing the Right Breed
I saw this headline in the Orange County Register: Man fleeing burning Dana Point condo bitten by his dog My first thought was, “What kind of a dog turns on its owner in a crisis? It’s got to be a pit bull.” Sure enough . . . A pit bull spooked by the flames and smoke turned on his owner as the man tried to escape the flames with the dog in his arms. The man, who lived in the condo where the fire started, was badly bitten on both arms. The man left a trail of blood down the stairs. The dog was not hurt in the blaze. The dog wasn’t hurt, although an officer on the scene did offer to shoot the animal to keep the owner from being mangled any worse than he already was, an offer the owner declined. “Please don’t shoot my dog!” he pleaded.… Read more →