I was driving my son to school one day when the following conversation ensued.
ME: Do you have any exams today?
HIM: No . . . and why do you call them “exams”? We have “tests” and “quizzes,” not [in a dopey voice] “exams” — or whatever they called them back in the 1800s.
If he thinks that comments like that are going to put me off my game, he must have me confused with his mom.
ME: Do you have any exams tomorrow?