Sharks: Another Reason I Don’t Snorkel

Sharks in the water
— Associated Press

This is such an inane activity — snorkeling, that is, not biting people in half — that if you find yourself engaged in it, it’s a pretty good indication that your life has already gone on way too long.

According to the article:

The fatality is the first in Australian waters since December, when an 18-year-old surfer was bitten in half by a 16-foot great white shark off a beach in the southern city of Adelaide. A week earlier, a shark killed a 38-year-old diver spear fishing on the Great Barrier Reef off northeast Australia.

Surfing, spear fishing . . . more activities for people who’ve exceeded their useful lifespan.

And are sharks really biting people in half in Australia? Just bisecting ’em right down the middle? Wouldn’t it be more accurate to say “bitten in two“?

Just asking . . .

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