EppsNet Archive: Baldness

Who Listens to Sports Talk?

I had a sports talk station on the car radio this afternoon . . . based on the the advertisements, the target demographic is low-testosterone bald guys whose dicks don’t work . . . Read more →

Things to Do With an Amputated Limb

I saw a guy in a men’s room today, on his way out, checking himself in the mirror and making a gesture with his hand like he was adjusting his hair, except he was totally bald. Some people, after having a limb amputated, can feel the limb as if it were still there. Does this also happen with hair? If you have a limb amputated, do you get to take it home with you? I’d like to stick my amputated arm up my sleeve and shake hands with people. Think of how great that would be on Halloween: “Have some candy, kid. AAAAAAHHHHHHH! MY ARM!” Read more →

Baldness vs. Malaria

Why is there so much more research done on baldness than on malaria? Because rich people go bald, and they don’t die of malaria. — Bill Gates Read more →

Aging Boy Bands

A Facebook friend posted some photos from the Backstreet Boys concert in L.A. last weekend. Most of the “boys” now have worse hairlines than I do. Shouldn’t bands named Boys or Kids be forced to retire when they start to go bald? Or at least change their name from, say, New Kids on the Block to Old Guys on the Porch? Read more →