My son, dismissing the need for parental advice in his senior year of high school: “You only know what people tell you. I know what’s going on.” Read more →
EppsNet Archive: High School
I’m Worried About My Boy
He’s killing himself with schoolwork and college applications. He doesn’t sleep anymore, just keeps himself going with 5-hour energy drinks. All of the college apps are due by Nov. 1 so if he makes it that far maybe he’ll be okay . . . Read more →
Twitter: 2010-09-01
I hate to see my son cry when I drop him off for the first day of school. Fortunately he’s old enough to drive himself this year. # Read more →
Short Books
My kid’s got a summer assignment for AP English — select and read two novels from a list of about 20. I’ve been telling him since June that I’d be glad to go over the list with him and recommend books that he might enjoy reading but he’s put it off so long now that I’m limited to recommending short books that he might enjoy reading, and that leaves us with Ethan Frome, Wide Sargasso Sea and All the Pretty Horses. He comes back from the bookstore with Frome and Sargasso, two books about men who marry crazy women. He ruled out All the Pretty Horses because it’s 300 pages long and “I read the first sentence and it had like six adjectives.” Read more →
Hazing
My son’s a high school senior. He’s been playing in a basketball summer league with the school team. When we hear about the Dez Bryant hazing story on the car radio, he says, “We made Norman [a sophomore] put our dishes away at the San Diego tournament.” “Why him?” I ask. “He talks a lot. Pierce [a freshman] is quiet.” Read more →
Northwood High School, Irvine, CA
— I see you’ve got a real international student body here. — Um, not really. It’s 49.6 percent Asian, 49.6 percent white and 0.8 percent everything else. Try finding a black kid. — I’ve seen a couple of black kids. They play football. — Try finding one in a classroom. Try finding a Mexican kid. If a Mexican kid walks on campus, the whole school goes into soft lockdown. Read more →
Personal Preferences
One of my son’s friends, his parents split up some time back because his dad, as it turned out, was not really attracted to women. I met the gentleman for the first time last night at a school concert. How he was able to convince anyone, including himself, that he’s not gay is a mystery. “Did you notice they’re opening a new restaurant at South Coast Plaza?” he said in a voice as gay as Christmas. “They’ll be serving only locally grown food. I was on my way to the Apple Store . . .” Now I’m not saying that every man who cares about where his food is grown or owns an Apple product is gay but . . . “I own an Apple product,” my son says. “Yeah, an iPod,” I reply. “That’s okay. That’s mainstream.” Read more →
A Word of Advice on SAT Prep
My son and some classmates are at our house studying for tomorrow’s SAT subject exams . . . “How’s it going?” I ask. “It sucks,” the boy says. “Well,” I say, “since I’ve already completed high school and Lightning doesn’t have to go, we’re going to go to the park.” “Aren’t you cool,” he says. “We are,” I say. “We’re cool. Can I offer a word of advice? Just relax. It’s not like your whole future depends on the outcome of this test . . . no wait, it does! AAAAHHHH! PANIC!!!” Read more →
Schools on Strike
“Can you take me to the Barnes and Noble by your work?” my son asks. “I need to get AP study guides.” I work in Aliso Viejo but since it’s Saturday and I’m not going to work, I ask why we can’t go to the Barnes and Noble right here in Irvine. “Asian kids are running rampant on the selection,” he says. “I’m guessing there’s not as much hustle and bustle in Aliso, especially since our schools don’t go on strike.” Read more →
Late Starts
Every Wednesday, the Irvine high schools have a late start — 9 a.m. instead of 8. Also: a few times a year, like today, they have something called a Super Late Start day, where classes don’t start till 9:50. My wife brings up a good point: Why don’t they ever have Super Early Start, where we drop the kids off at 6 a.m.? Read more →
Tips for Test Takers
My son has a math test today. He was up till 3 a.m. studying for it. In my experience, a positive mindset is essential to successful test-taking, so on the drive to school, I give him a piece of advice. “Walk into the classroom,” I say, “look at the teacher and lay down a challenge, like ‘Let’s do it.’” “It’s not her test,” the boy says. “What does that mean?” “It means every class takes the same test — Schneider, D’Antonio . . .” “THAT DOESN’T MATTER,” I say. “The important thing is to lay down the challenge. ‘Stop bitin’ on my styles.’ Granted, that one doesn’t make any sense, but it gives you the positive mental framework that you need for mathematical success.” Read more →
Pride and Prejudice
As my son comes downstairs for dinner, he says, “It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune –” I finish it with him: “– must be in want of a wife.” “We spent 45 minutes in class today analyzing that one sentence,” he says. “It’s a very famous sentence,” I say. “The next sentence will probably go faster.” Read more →
How to Get an A in Hell
At Northwood High School, Honors Euro Lit is known by its acronym — HEL (pronounced hell) — and widely regarded as the hardest class at the school. In order to get an A in the class for the first semester, my son needed a very high score — around a 98 — on the final exam, didn’t get it, and finished with a semester grade of 89.27 — a high B. If he’d had at least an 89.5, the teacher would have rounded it up to an A. So out of 1,000+ possible points over the course of the semester, an 89.27 means you missed an A by only three or four points. I’ve always encouraged the boy to be proactive with his teachers. Some people call this “sucking up” but I’ve been a teacher myself and I can tell you that teachers like students who are engaged and make… Read more →
What Would Hope Do?
A young lady named Hope Xu — from University High right here in Irvine — scored a perfect 2400 on this year’s SAT exam. I’ve advised my 16-year-old son that henceforth, when he’s faced with a tough decision in life, he should ask himself the question “What would Hope Xu do?” I know one thing she wouldn’t do and that is to run into her dad’s bedroom at 11 p.m. and start doing flying front kicks when he’s trying to sleep. “Why are you doing that?” I ask him. “I just drank a Red Bull,” he says, then dances back out the door singing a song I don’t recognize . . . Read more →
Homework Follies
Worked some physics problems with my boy last night . . . the subject at hand was torque, which his textbook expresses in units of mN. “Back in my day, we used to measure torque in foot-pounds,” I said. “What’s mN? Millinewtons?” “I don’t know,” he said. “I guess so.” “OK, we’re off to a great start!” Read more →
Every Minute Counts
We were trying to figure out what time the boy needed to wake up to get to the PSAT test on time. The test is at 9 a.m., check-in starts at 8:40, it takes 10 minutes or so to drive to the school, and 30 minutes for him to get out of bed, have some breakfast and get ready to go, so I was thinking he’d need to get up at 8 a.m. “WHAT?!” he shouted. “That’s too early! I’ll be the first person there!” “OK,” I said, “what time do you think would be good?” “8:05,” he said. Read more →
What Am I Thinking About?
High school roller hockey starts tonight. To prevent the use of ringers, each kid has to turn in an enlarged color copy of their school ID card. I reminded my son about that requirement last night as he was doing homework in his room. “Why don’t you go ahead and make the copy now while you’re thinking about it?” I said. “I’m not thinking about it,” he said. “You are thinking about it.” “What am I thinking about?” “Okay, do it your way,” I said, and left. “What did you come in here for?” he called after me. Hilarity is really going to ensue when he shows up for the game tonight and can’t play because he doesn’t have a copy of his ID card . . . Read more →
Technology Enhances Chivalry
My son’s a junior in high school now . . . tonight he went to a school homecoming dance instead of watching the USC-Cal game with his dad. Sing it with me: The cat’s in the cradle and the silver spoon . . . This morning he went with his mom to buy a dress shirt and a tie. When they’d narrowed the choice down to two ties, he took a photo of them with his phone and sent them to the girl to see which one would go better with her dress . . . Read more →
11th Grade Reading List
My son and I went to Barnes and Noble in Irvine this weekend to buy the books on his 11th grade Euro Lit reading list: A Room of One’s Own by Virginia Woolf, Candide by Voltaire, One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich by Alexander Solzhenitsyn, Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen, and The Stranger by Albert Camus. “Have you read any of these books?” I asked the checkout girl. “I’ve read Candide and Pride and Prejudice,” she said. “Candide is fun. Virginia Woolf is kind of a downer though, isn’t she? Didn’t she kill herself? “She did,” the girl admitted. “Doesn’t that set a bad example for the kids?” The Irvine store didn’t have the edition of Ivan Denisovich that the boy needed but the guy at customer service was able to call around and find a copy at the Aliso Viejo store. The boy was beside… Read more →
Things I Love to Do on a Hot Summer Evening
My son’s going into 11th grade next week. He’s got a couple of honors classes, a couple of AP classes, Spanish 3 and a music class. It looks like a very tough schedule to me — he’s also got college entrance exams this year — but that’s where his academic history has brought him and he says he wants to do it. One thing I didn’t know about AP classes is that they start giving kids assignments during summer vacation. He’s working on ’em right now! He asked me for a little help on the physics assignment so I get to do two things I love to do on a hot summer evening: sip premium tequila on ice with a lime, and solve problems like this: A kangaroo jumps to a vertical height of 2.7m. How long is it in the air before returning to Earth? Oh I’m in heaven! Read more →