EppsNet

• Does this city make my butt look big? – http://goo.gl/N72i #
• Sign of the times: I noticed this morning that the newspaper racks (LA Times, OC Register) in front of LA Fitness have been removed #

Man accused of almost beheading best friend, setting him on fire

— Orange County Register

Adventurers

Jonny Copp, a well-known mountain climber and adventurer who grew up in Fullerton, has been found dead on the side of Mount Edgar, China, the apparent victim of an avalanche, according to a variety of websites, including his own.

— Orange County Register

Three words that come to mind when I hear someone introduced as an “adventurer”: Die, die, die . . .

IRVINE A man is dead — and his wife and son injured — after his daughter’s ex-boyfriend allegedly took the family hostage for five hours beginning late Friday, police said.

— OCRegister.com

That’s the second murder in town in the last two weeks!

PACK YOUR BAGS HONEY! WE’RE MOVING TO SANTA ANA!

Physicist who invented the Taser gun dies

— OCRegister.com

Come to find out, the guy who invented the Taser lived right here in Orange County, in Mission Viejo!

I’m shocked!

Last year, Dick’s Sporting Goods bought Chick’s Sporting Goods. According to the Orange County Register, the four Chick’s locations in Orange County, including the one in Tustin that I shop at, will all be replaced by Dick’s by the second half of 2009.

I’m not happy about this. Oh, I know there are people who like Dick’s, and there are people who are 50-50 on the matter and can go either way, but there are also a lot of people like me who really prefer Chick’s.

In fact, I’ve been doing Chick’s for so long that I don’t see how I’m ever going to get used to Dick’s.

ANAHEIM — Authorities say a woman apparently jumped off an Anaheim freeway overpass Thursday and died. The Orange County Register reports that 50-year-old Sally Brown plunged to her death just after 11 a.m. from the East La Palma Avenue overpass onto the westbound 91 Freeway.

Aliso Viejo man dies after falling while hanging Christmas lights

— Orange County Register

This cautionary tale includes a helpful tip from the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission:

Falls from ladders or rooftops are comical in the movies, but in reality, they can be a very dangerous thing.

Actually, falls from ladders and rooftops can be funny in real life too, but only when they happen to someone else.

See also: Another Reason I Let My Wife Handle the Grocery Shopping

IRVINE — A mentally disturbed man wielding a samurai-style sword killed two workers and slashed three other people at an Albertsons before police shot and killed him Sunday.

— Orange County Register, June 30, 2003

Banzai!

Continue reading Another Reason I Let My Wife Handle the Grocery Shopping