People who back into parking spaces

Look, toolbox — you can either back into the spot when you arrive or back out of the spot when you leave. Backing in is harder because you’ve got less room to work with and you don’t want to bang into a neighboring vehicle. If you back out, you’re backing into open space.

But the worst thing is that by backing in, you put your driver’s side door right next to my driver’s side door, so we have to wait for each other to get in and out of the cars . . .

Serial Entrepreneur — I hope there’s a special place in hell for people who refer to themselves as “serial entrepreneurs.” What the heck is the difference between an entrepreneur and a serial entrepreneur? I suppose Bill Gates is an entrepreneur and e.e. cummings’ Uncle Sol was a serial entrepreneur — farmer, chicken farmer, skunk farmer, worm farmer.

Length — For some reason, people who talk about basketball now describe players as having “great length.” Nobody says, “He’s very tall.” They say, “He’s got great length.”

News flash: People don’t have length. They have height. They even have width. But they don’t have length — except at birth and shortly thereafter, when we measure them lying down because they can’t stand up yet.

Describing a basketball player as having “great length” is as uninformative as saying, “He’s a tall black guy with long arms.”

In this image supplied by Greenpeace, U.S. artist Spencer Tunick and Greenpeace Switzerland present hundreds of naked people to symbolize the vulnerability of glaciers under climate change.

Is that what it’s supposed to symbolize?

What did it symbolize when he photographed hundreds of naked people in Venezuela, France, Britain, etc., etc., etc.

Isn’t anyone else bored out of their minds with this idiot yet? He’s like that miscreant who dresses up Weimaraners, and everyone else who has one limited idea and keeps repeating it over and over and over.

I don’t claim to be a great artist, but let me tell you how this glacier shoot should have been done:

You put the hundreds of people on the glacier, at which time they discover to their dismay that they’re stuck there like a tongue on a lamppost. You leave them there to slowly starve to death and decompose.

It reeks of symbolism . . .

That Wegman guy who dresses up the Weimaraners . . .

I saw him on a TV commercial this morning. Enough already! Let’s move on!

Dressing up a Weimaraner once is kind of funny, but if you’re going to spend your whole life doing it, somebody really needs to kick your ass.

The same goes for Anne Geddes . . .

Hugh Hefner

As if the Carl’s Jr. commercials weren’t bad enough, I saw one of those “Celebrities on the Town” shows where “Hef” is getting out of a limousine with his entourage of girls, shambling into a club like a doddering old man in what appears to be a bathrobe, his hair sticking way out in back like he slept on it the wrong way and nobody bothered to tell him . . .

Pathetic — hurry up and die.

Continue reading More People I’m Sick Unto Death Of