15-Year-Old Arrested in Shooting Death of 11-Year-Old Girl — usnews.com Give the poor kid a break. He was shooting at a 13-year-old boy and missed. The girl was in the wrong place at the wrong time, that’s all. Read more →
Author Archive: Hostile Witness
What’s Wrong With the SAT?
According to the LA Times, the chronic absence rate in LAUSD for black students is 57 percent. For Latinos, it is 49 percent. And poor performance by these groups on standardized tests like the SAT is due to the fact that the tests are racist, not because the students don’t show up for school. Read more →
I’m the Damn Paterfamilias!
He couldn’t have just turned off the set? Read more →
Spoiled Child at the Heart of Liberalism?
RIP P.J. O’Rourke pic.twitter.com/126Ft3XHIf — Conservative Momma (@conmomma) February 20, 2022 Read more →
This Day in History: Aretha Franklin
On Jan. 3, 1987, Aretha Franklin became the first (biological) woman inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. This may be an opportunity for someone inducted before 1987 to put on a dress and say “Wait a minute, I identify as a woman” and knock Aretha out of the history books. It worked for Amy Schneider. Read more →
“Get the Vaccine” — Joe Biden
OK grandpa, now go take a nap. That’s the only Biden quote I have. Nothing on the latest jobs report, massive layoffs, high gas and energy prices, high food prices, high crime, empty shelves, open borders or Afghanistan. If you have any good ones, let me know and I’ll post them here. Read more →
Dirty Laundrie: How NOT to Commit the Perfect Murder
I have long maintained that the best way to kill someone and get away with it is to push them off a cliff. While hiking, for example. It’s simple, clean, no need to dispose of evidence, and proving beyond a reasonable doubt in a court of law that the deceased didn’t just fall off the cliff accidentally is almost assuredly impossible. Unfortunately, the opportunity to push someone off a cliff is no longer on the table for me, having published in advance my admiration for cliffs as a murder weapon, but I’ve got other ideas as well. That said, the worst way to murder someone is to take them on a cross-country road trip, document the whole thing on social media, then drive home by yourself and disappear. Read more →
Pronouns
I know people who identify themselves with plural pronouns, e.g., “they/them,” but I’ve never heard any of them refer to themselves with plural pronouns, e.g., “us” or “we.” They always say “I” or “me.” A couple of possibilities, not mutually exclusive: They want to call attention to themselves but in a way that they haven’t really thought through. They realize how ridiculous it sounds to refer to an individual person with a plural pronoun. I mean, go ahead and call yourself anything you want, but if you’re going to burden others with absurdities, you should have to live with them yourself. Read more →
The Kaepernick Encounter
I was pumping gas at a local station when I noticed another guy pumping gas wearing a Colin Kaepernick jersey. It may add something to the story to know the race of the guy in the jersey so I’ll tell you that he was a black guy. “You got a problem with the jersey?” the guy asked me. I was actually just trying to get a clear look at the name on the jersey so I could read it, but the guy was apparently on a hair trigger to begin with. “Not with the jersey or you wearing the jersey, but Nike probably paid someone in Vietnam a dollar a day to stitch that jersey while Kaepernick himself gets paid millions to complain about inequality. You see the disconnect? Let him stitch his own jerseys, I mean what the hell else is he doing? He’s not playing football. “Did that… Read more →
One Year Later: Santa Monica Looks Back on Riots
One Year Later: Santa Monica looks back on riots — Santa Monica Daily Press More than 400 people were arrested and more than 150 businesses sustained significant damage. The story has photos but none of my favorites, which were the ones with people dashing out of smashed storefront windows with stolen merchandise in one hand and a Black Lives Matter sign in the other . . . Read more →
Why Can’t Democrats Fix LA?
According to my local paper, the Santa Monica Daily Press, LA’s “unhoused” population is being plagued by an epidemic of mental illness. (The search for euphemisms continues unabated as well. People living on the street used to be “bums,” then “homeless” and now “unhoused.”) One of the puzzling things about Los Angeles is why our political leaders can’t figure out how to solve any of our local problems, for example, what we fondly refer to as “the homelessness crisis.” It’s puzzling because the mayor is a Democrat, every member of the city council is also a Democrat, there isn’t a Republican in sight, so there’s nothing to stop them from enacting any policy they want to. It’s like they really have no idea how to solve any of the problems. It’s possible that in a city in which every elected official is a Republican that they would turn out to… Read more →
Movin’ On
“I’m still mad at the former guy for killing 500,000 of us. Anybody else feel the same way?” “I’m actually mad that he kept you alive. Also, there are 3 million global COVID deaths. Who are you mad at about those? Also, aren’t you from Toronto? What do you mean by ‘us’?” “I mean human beings.” “If you care about human beings, then why are you using the 500,000 number instead of 3 million? I get it, you didn’t like Trump. He’s gone. Why are you still spouting the same low-IQ bullshit? Move on already.” Read more →
International Transgender Day of Visibility
Did you know that March 31 is International Transgender Day of Visibility:? I didn’t know it either until today when someone posted an announcement on a corporate message board. It’s not even that new. It started in 2009. As Joe Biden would say, here’s the thing: 1) Everybody plays by the same rules. 2) Do whatever you want but don’t feel like you have to bash everyone over the fucking head with it. Is it within the rules for a woman to post on a corporate message board that she had vigorous intercourse with a man last night? And if someone takes exception she replies that she wants to recognize the accomplishments of heterosexual men and women, to celebrate the successes of the community and to educate those who may discriminate against cis-normative individuals? I feel like that would not be well-received, that we are implicitly operating under two sets… Read more →
Another Difference Between Men and Women
Breaking: USC has agreed to pay more than $1.1 billion to former patients of campus gynecologist George Tyndall, the largest sex abuse payout in higher education history. https://t.co/ipEtrsLGRc — Los Angeles Times (@latimes) March 25, 2021 My condolences to everyone involved in this painful case. Am I allowed to observe that men also have their genitals examined by medical professionals, who may be doctors, nurses or others, who may identify as male or female, straight or gay, but I’ve never heard of a man filing a lawsuit because he felt there was something wrong with the way the examination was conducted. Other than every single examination of male genitals being conducted in a way that was unquestionably above reproach, which seems unlikely, I don’t even want to speculate on the reason for the discrepancy. Also, my doctor, who identifies as female, once stuck her finger up my ass as part… Read more →
Then: “Kids in Cages”; Now: “Facilities Similar to Jail”
The number of unaccompanied teens and children in U.S. custody along the U.S.-Mexico border has reached record numbers, forcing children to stay longer in perilously overcrowded border facilities, many of which are similar to jail. — abcnews.go.com Unrelated thought: Didn’t President Biden campaign on amnesty and a halt to deportations? Read more →
An Underwhelming Correction
Here’s a pretty underwhelming correction: ?"Trump did not tell the investigator to “find the fraud” or say she would be “a national hero” if she did so."https://t.co/PnQm0aJyOu pic.twitter.com/GEzAJmhWDY — Alex Thompson (@AlexThomp) March 15, 2021 As a journalist, either put a goddamn name on the source so we can verify the information, or verify it yourself before publishing, not two months later, after everyone’s already assimilated the original bullshit as truth. Now a question: Why would anyone believe what they read or hear in the media anymore when “news” is attributed to anonymous “sources” and published without knowing, or apparently caring, whether or not it’s true? Read more →
Ban Dr. Seuss Before It’s Too Late
In Baltimore, there are 13 public high schools where zero percent of students can do math at grade level. There are six other city high schools where only 1 percent of students can do math at grade level. We must ban more Dr. Seuss books before these numbers get worse! Read more →
Why I Can’t Be a Liberal
I saw a couple of things trending on Twitter today . . . one was the death of Rush Limbaugh, and the other was “Rest in Piss,” a vulgarism that a lot of people were using to celebrate Limbaugh’s death. My own political views aren’t based on left or right, Democrat or Republican. They’re based mainly on freedom and self-reliance. If you can mind your own business, keep your hands to yourself and you’re not defrauding anyone, you can do anything you like, I don’t care. For example, if you want to have an abortion, if you want to marry someone of the same sex, go ahead. These views would align me with people on the left of the political spectrum. I’m also disgusted by the right-wing penchant to inject religion into politics. But I would never, never, never identify myself as liberal, as progressive . . . liberals are… Read more →
Hawaiian Shirts a Symbol of White Supremacy?
WOOF WOOF WOOF pic.twitter.com/h9f43D0dow — Woke Watchdog (@WokeWoofDog) January 9, 2021 My closet: P.S. I didn’t actually read the Hawaiian shirts article referenced above based on my policy of not reading articles where the headline sounds like absolute bullshit. Read more →
2 + 2 = 4. Discuss.
“The idea of 2 + 2 equaling 4 is cultural and because of western imperialism and colonization, we think of it as the only way of knowing.” “The idea that 2 + 2 equals 4 is cultural is also cultural. It just originated from a much more stupid culture. If you want to achieve anything in life, go with the idea that 2 + 2 equals 4.” Read more →