[See You in Hell is a feature by our guest blogger, Satan — PE] Greetings from the afterlife! I love it when people say “Get thee behind me, Satan.” I am behind you. I’m thinking of giving you a shove. See you in Hell . . . Read more →
EppsNet Archive: Bible
Mysterious Ways
And it came to pass after these things, that God tested Abraham and said unto him, “Abraham!” And he said, “Behold, here I am.” And He said, “Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah, and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of.” — Genesis 22:1-2 ‘Schizophrenic’ nanny SMILES in Russian court after claiming ‘Allah ordered her’ to decapitate four-year-old girl and walk Moscow streets brandishing the child’s severed head – Daily Mail Online India: 400 men cut off their testicles to ‘get closer to God’ following advice from ‘guru’ – International Business Times God seems to enjoy the occasional game of Supernatural Simon Says: Cut off your testicles. Cut off your own fookin testicles, mate. God says cut off your testicles. Oh . . . Read more →
Eat This Scroll
oreover He said unto me, “Son of man, eat what thou findest: eat this scroll, and go, speak unto the house of Israel.” — Ezekiel 3:1 Read more →
or why should my freedom be judged by another’s conscience? — I Corinthians 10:29
If There’s One Thing I Can’t Tolerate, It’s Intolerance
NEW YORK (AP) — A&E has declined to comment on new video of “Duck Dynasty” star Phil Robertson reviving past anti-gay remarks. His comments are included in a sermon delivered at his church in West Monroe, Louisiana, on Easter Sunday. Robertson includes homosexuals with other groups such as thieves and adulterers as hell-bound sinners. — New anti-gay remarks by ‘Duck Dynasty’ star emerge – MSN TV News Oooh, new anti-gay remarks. I’m trying to get appropriately offended about this but I can’t do it: As previously noted the last time he said the same thing, he’s not ad-libbing those remarks, he’s quoting a bible verse: Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the Kingdom of God? Be not deceived: Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor the effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, nor thieves, nor the covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners shall inherit the… Read more →
We’re Supporting Tolerance and Inclusion by Telling People to Shut the Hell Up
“Duck Dynasty” star Phil Robertson has been put on an indefinite hiatus from filming the smash hit A&E reality series following inflammatory remarks about gay people he made in an interview with GQ magazine. . . . In the interview, which appears in the January issue of GQ, Robertson, founder of the Duck Commander family business of duck calls, referred to gay people as “homosexual offenders” who would not “inherit the Kingdom of God.” He also said a woman’s vagina was “more desirable” than a man’s anus. — GLAAD slams ‘Duck Dynasty’ star Phil Robertson for ‘vile’ remarks – latimes.com LET’S ENCOURAGE TOLERANCE AND DIVERSITY BY MAKING THIS GUY SHUT THE HELL UP! Here’s Robertson’s full quote on “homosexual offenders”: “Don’t be deceived. Neither the adulterers, the idolaters, the male prostitutes, the homosexual offenders, the greedy, the drunkards, the slanderers, the swindlers — they won’t inherit the kingdom of God.… Read more →
Waving Bibles at Scientists
The Ohio Supreme Court has ruled that a public school district was legally justified in firing science instructor James Freshwater, who waved a Bible at his students, distributed religious pamphlets and talked about creationism in evolution lessons. Personally, I’d fire him just based on the look of smug, benevolent certainty on his face. He doesn’t look like a man who struggles with doubt, which is the essence of science. Read more →
Ecclesiastes 1:1-7
The words of the Preacher, the son of David, king in Jerusalem. “Vanity of vanities,” says the Preacher; “Vanity of vanities, all is vanity.” What profit has a man from all his labor In which he toils under the sun? One generation passes away, and another generation comes; But the earth abides forever. The sun also rises, and the sun goes down, And hastens to the place where it arose. The wind goes toward the south, And turns around to the north; The wind whirls about continually, And comes again on its circuit. All the rivers run into the sea, Yet the sea is not full; To the place from which the rivers come, There they return again. — Ecclesiastes 1:1-7 Read more →
The Grand Inquisitor Addresses Jesus
nd now, do You see those stones in this parched and barren desert? Turn them into loaves of bread and men will follow You like cattle, grateful and docile, although constantly fearful lest You withdraw Your hand and they lose Your loaves. . . . You thought, what sort of freedom would they have if their obedience was bought with bread? You replied that man does not live by bread alone. . . . So, in the end, they will lay their freedom at our feet and say to us, “Enslave us but feed us!” And they will finally understand that freedom and the assurance of daily bread for everyone are two incompatible notions that could never co-exist! . . . They will marvel at us and worship us like gods, because, by becoming their masters, we have accepted the burden of freedom that they were too frightened to face,… Read more →
Provoke Not Your Children to Wrath
And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord . . . Read more →
Theological Question
And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise them up . . . — James 5:15 So why did the Lord make the sick person sick in the first place? Read more →
Words
But I say unto you, that every idle word that men shall speak, they shall give account thereof in the day of judgment. For by thy words thou shalt be justified, and by thy words thou shalt be condemned. — Matthew 12:36-37 Read more →
Do you see a man who excels in his work? He will stand before kings; He will not stand before unknown men. — Proverbs 22:29
But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth. — James 3:14
A Father’s Instruction
I was a son to my father . . . And he taught me and said to me, “Let your heart hold fast my words. . . .” — Proverbs 4:3-4 Read more →