Related Links

• Whistle disparity in Game 2 leaves Lakers feeling foul — ESPN.com

Be careful what you wish for . . .

A male and female co-worker are bickering, as they often do.

An onlooker says, “You two are like a married couple . . . but without the sex and everything.”

One cow to another:

They’re not booing. They’re saying ‘Moooo!’

“I beat the traffic this morning. I got here an hour and a half early, but I only had to get up 45 minutes earlier.”

“So you saved 45 minutes.”

“I saved . . . let’s see . . . (looking thoughtfully skyward) . . . 45 minutes!

A project manager talking to a business analyst:

PM: Can you have that done by today?

BA: No I can’t, and here’s why. [Lengthy explanation deleted.] I can have it done by next week.

PM: Can you have it done by tomorrow?

You can’t beat that with a sharp stick!

Why does the stick have to be sharp if you’re just going to beat something with it?

“I wanna tell ya, this Bob Hope is really funny.”

“You are Bob Hope.”

“I am?! Am I still alive?”

The best thing about all the NBA players from Europe and Latin America is when they’re interviewed after the game, you can understand them.

A brief conversation between Victor, one of our project managers, and our Sales VP as Victor is walking out of the VP’s office:

VP: You’re the greatest!
VICTOR: I’m trying.
VP (louder now, as Victor is halfway down the hall): Thanks, Wayne!

Him: I’m going to Shooters tonight, if you want to go. Have you ever been there on Wednesdays?
Her: I’ve been to Shooters.
Him: Have you ever been on a Wednesday?
Her: Actually, I try to avoid places like that.
Him: I’ve never been either. My buddy wanted to go.