His Master’s Voice

Nipper, the RCA Victor dog

My wife is making noises about getting rid of the dog, because we just moved into a new house and he’s making a mess of it. He’s not doing anything bad, it’s just that normal canine activity puts some wear and tear on a place, which is why I said don’t get a dog in the first place.

“Did anybody listen?” I ask no one in particular. “Does anyone ever listen to a single thing I say?”

“Yes,” my son answers.

“Who?”

“The dog does, sometimes.”

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