First the bad news: ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! THERE’S NOTHING BUT BAD NEWS! THE HOUSING MARKET HAS COLLAPSED! GLOBAL MARKETS ARE IMPLODING! EVERYTHING IS SPINNING OUT OF CONTROL! THE FALCON CANNOT HEAR THE FALCONER! THE CEREMONY OF INNOCENCE IS DROWNED! THE BEST LACK ALL CONVICTION WHILE THE WORST ARE FULL OF PASSIONATE INTENSITY! EVERYBODY PANIC!
OK, now the good news: Hmmm . . . well . . . as long as I have a job, I can make enough to live on . . . I think . . .
My son suggests that we buy some red wheels for the SUV to match the color of the vehicle.
“How much would that cost?” my wife asks.
“I don’t know,” I say. “A lot of money.”
“But it’d be the pimpingest pimp sauce thing you could ever do,” the boy replies.
That’s what Ed McMahon’s financial adviser used to say when Ed said, “Are you kidding?! The only way I could afford that is to work till I’m 90!”
I take my cell phone out of my pocket and notice that the battery’s gone dead.
“Way to plan ahead,” my son says, without looking up from his GameBoy.
I recently sold a house in Laguna for $3.5 million. It was on about 2,000 square feet of land, maybe a twentieth of an acre, and the house might cost about $500,000 if you wanted to replace it. So the land sold for something like $60 million an acre.
