My mistake is when someone asks my birthday, I either tell them or I don’t so I’m dismayed to find that the key to world-wide fame is to tell one person the month and another person the day . . .
Notes from the Golden Orange
EppsNet Archive: Internet
Russia to vastly increase internet spying capabilities. I eagerly await Mr. Snowden's principled denouncement! http://t.co/rWFgYz0j05
— Garry Kasparov (@Kasparov63) October 21, 2013
I'm sure a Sakharov Prize nominee like Snowden will bravely stand up to criticize the invasive policies of his new homeland.
— Garry Kasparov (@Kasparov63) October 21, 2013
Pornographic Picture Processing Interferes with Working Memory Performance
Researchers at the University of Duisburg-Essen found that looking at internet porn has a negative effect on working memory.
Wait a second . . . did I already post this link?
Students Rush to Web Classes, but Profits May Be Much Later — NYTimes.com
Profits shmofits . . . if you’re not using Coursera.org, you are missing a life-changing opportunity.
America is the land of opportunity.
While some Americans sit around whining about 1 Percenters, rising young innovator Matthew Creed of Kansas has figured out how to turn publically available data into a money maker: post the names, mug shots and addresses of arrestees on a web site and offer to remove the information for a $200 fee.
And by the way, he’s only operating in Johnson County, Kansas, so the market is wide open for other budding entrpreneurs who want to apply the same business model in their own area.
A 2011 study by telecommunications giant Ericsson found that 35% of iPhone and Android users check their email or Facebook account before getting out of bed in the morning.
We are lonely but fearful of intimacy. Constant connectivity offers the illusion of companionship without the demands of friendship. We can’t get enough of each other if we can have each other at a distance and in amounts we can control.
Things which matter most must never be at the mercy of things which matter least.
You’ve got to keep your priorities in order . . .
We’re developing an on-site conference registration system . . . the topic generating the most email bandwidth yesterday was the ability to retry a declined credit card if the on-site Internet connection is down.
Declining a credit card when the Internet is down is an unusual scenario that may never occur. We’re not even far enough along in development to be able to say for sure that we can accept a credit card when the Internet is up, but by golly, we’ll be able to decline one when it’s down.
My head is spinning . . .
Thus spoke The Programmer.
Rep. Weiner of New York — one of the 13 original colonies — has been sending photos of his penis to women in Texas, Washington and other points west.
When I was president, Texas and Washington weren’t even part of the country, and if I wanted to show a woman my dick, she had to be right there in the room with me.1
And still there are some misfits who insist that there is no such thing as progress.
- Yes, I could have made a sketch and sent it through the mail but that could take weeks.
Uh oh, it looks like the wireless connection here at EppsNet headquarters just went down . . .
“NOTHING MAKES ME ANGRIER THAN AN UNRELIABLE NETWORK CONNECTION!” my son yells. “WE NEED A NEW ROUTER! WE NEED A NEW MODEM! WE NEED A NEW SERVICE PROVIDER! WE NEED NEW COMPUTERS!”
“We don’t need new computers,” his mom says.
“YES WE DO!”
My wife got some promotional pens delivered to the house today from pens.com. Did you ever notice how pens.com looks a lot like penis.com?
I wonder if anyone owns the penis.com domain name? Hang on a sec . . .
OK, penis.com is taken — but penis.edu is still available! University of Penis!
If you do stuff online, people are tracking it and putting it into a database and trying to sell you stuff based on that. There’s not much you can do about it except not be online. And it’s not all that bad, really, to get ads for diapers when you’re having a baby, or ads for cars when you are looking to buy a car. Life will go on.
On the web there’s a certain kind of encouragement to never ask yourself how much information you really need. But when I get to the point where I’m seeking advice twelve hours a day on how to take a nap or what kind of notebook to buy, I’m so far off the idea of lifehacks that it’s indistinguishable from where we started. There’s very little advice right now to tell people that the only thing to do is action, and everything else is horseshit.
- RT @eddiepepitone: Prophets of doom make 13 dollars an hour, life coaches 35 an hour. So who’s full of shit now? #
- RT @thesulk: “Who’s that actor?” “I don’t know, and I may never know.” (Watching TV Before the Internet) #
- RT @capricecrane: “Heidi Montag Wants Huge Breast Implants OUT.” She’s getting good at cutting giant boobs out of her life. #
- Heidi Montag Regrets Breast Implants (mtv.com)
Every month, I present web site metrics to our Web Steering committee. Since this month’s meeting fell on April 1, I took the opportunity to mock up and present a set of fake charts showing all of our key metrics falling off a cliff.
OK I know what you’re thinking — not as funny as cling wrap on a toilet seat. You’re right but chart pranks are more cerebral . . .