EppsNet Archive: Crime

I’ve Got an Idea for a TV Show


MEXICO (PIX11) — Mexican drug traffickers are abducting bus passengers and forcing them to fight each other like gladiators according to published reports. The winners of the fights are then ordered to become assassins. — Mexican Cartel Force Gladiator Fights and Suicide Missions – WPIX This would make GREAT television! I’m pitching it as a reality show/game show hybrid. Working title: Who Wants to be a Mexican Hit Man? Read more →

Crime and Showbiz


I do think that crime and show business have never been more closely aligned. I don’t know if there has ever been a time where criminal arrests are worth as much in terms of $$ as going on a publicity tour or being in a movie. — Merrill Markoe Read more →



Cops: Porn actor kills 1, hurts 2 in L.A. — msnbc.com This guy must be incredibly well-built — wait, what? Read more →

Bottom Story of the Day


Director Polanski feels depressed in jail: lawyer — Yahoo! News Read more →

Unfair to Dogs


California man suspected of murdering wife, dog arrested at Peace Arch — Bellingham Herald Hi everybody! It’s me, Lightning! Here’s what I don’t understand: If a California man is suspected of killing his wife, why would they arrest a dog at the Peace Arch? It doesn’t make sense and it’s not fair to the dog. I’m going to stop reading the news. It’s too upsetting . . . — Lightning Read more →

Be on the Lookout for a Hardened Criminal


Man arrested may be linked to Viagra theft — OCRegister.com Read more →

To Live and Die in Irvine


IRVINE – A group of solemn people sat around tables at a fast-food Chinese restaurant off Jeffrey Road on Wednesday night after a man was shot and killed while sitting in a white Lexus parked behind the eatery. — OCRegister.com At least he died in a nice car. It’s Irvine, Jake! This happened a stone’s throw from my house. Well, more than a stone’s throw but let’s say a hard 5-iron with a good bounce off Trabuco Road. I’ve been to that Chinese restaurant many times. (It’s a dine-in restaurant, not a fast-food place, despite what the Register says.) Don’t worry about me though. Irvine is still the safest city in the country. That guy must have gotten himself mixed up in some kind of trouble . . . Read more →

Police Dog in Action


One of my owner’s friends sent him this image of a police dog in action. I’ll bet that guy didn’t expect the dog to jump over the car like that! I wish the image was bigger so I could see the look on his face! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! — Lightning Read more →

The Postman Always Rings Twice


“Earlier in this case, at a bail hearing, I said to Mr. Simpson, I didn’t know if he was arrogant, ignorant or both,” [District Judge Jackie] Glass said. “During the trial and through this proceeding, I got the answer, and it was both.” — CNN.com   Read more →

A Business Model for Selling Crack


My wife loves to keep bags from the grocery store. Why does she love to keep bags from the grocery store? Your guess is as good as mine. Probably better if you haven’t been drinking tequila all afternoon like I have. My son walks into the kitchen . . . He says, “We’ve got enough bags here to open our own store.” “Good idea!” I reply. “You know what we’re going to sell? All the crap laying around in your room.” “For a second,” he says, “I thought you said ‘crack.’” “Crack . . . hey, that’s a good idea too! Ordinarily, you want to buy crack, you’ve got to go hang out on a street corner in some undesirable location. We’ll bring upscale ambiance to the crack business. ‘Paper or plastic?’ Who would suspect you’re toting crack around in that Trader Joe’s bag?” Read more →

3 Former Titans of Industry Now Having a Worse Day Than You


Ken Lay – On trial for conspiracy and fraud. Could get 20 to 30 years in prison. Not good if you’re already 64 years old. Scott McNealy – Following yet another dismal financial report, resigns as Sun’s CEO after 22 years. Sanjay Kumar – Former CA Inc. CEO pleads guilty in $2.2 billion accounting fraud, faces up to 20 years in prison. Read more →

« Previous Page