A woman comes home from the grocery store with three bags of Lay’s Potato Chips . . . “These were on sale,” she says. “You buy three bags and each bag is $1.53. You know how much one bag is usually? $4.50. It’s like buying one bag and getting two bags free.” “How much would it cost if we bought no bags of potato chips?” someone asks. “That’s not an option.” Read more →
EppsNet Archive: Food
Japan, Day 5: Snow Monkeys, Yudanaka
Snow Monkeys Jigokudani Monkey Park (Jigokudani Yaen Koen) is in Yamanouchi, Shimotakai District, Nagano Prefecture, Japan. It is part of the Joshinetsu Kogen National Park (locally known as Shigakogen), and is located in the valley of the Yokoyu-River, in the northern part of the prefecture. The name Jigokudani, meaning “Hell’s Valley”, is due to the steam and boiling water that bubbles out of small crevices in the frozen ground, surrounded by steep cliffs and formidably cold and hostile forests. The heavy snowfalls (snow covers the ground for 4 months a year), an elevation of 850 metres, and being only accessible via a narrow two kilometre footpath through the forest, keep it uncrowded despite being relatively well-known. It is famous for its large population of wild Japanese Macaques (Macaca fuscata), more commonly referred to as Snow Monkeys, that go to the valley during the winter, foraging elsewhere in the national park… Read more →
Japan, Day 2: Kinkakuji Temple, Nishijin Textile Center, Tea Ceremony, Bullet Train, Atami
Kinkakuji Temple Kinkaku-ji (lit. “Temple of the Golden Pavilion”), officially named Rokuon-ji (lit. “Deer Garden Temple”), is a Zen Buddhist temple in Kyoto, Japan. The site of Kinkaku-ji was originally a villa called Kitayama-dai, belonging to a powerful statesman, Saionji Kintsune. Kinkaku-ji’s history dates to 1397, when the villa was purchased from the Saionji family by Shogun Ashikaga Yoshimitsu, and transformed into the Kinkaku-ji complex. When Yoshimitsu died, the building was converted into a Zen temple by his son, according to his wishes. During the Onin war, all of the buildings in the complex aside from the pavilion were burned down. On July 2, 1950, at 2:30 am, the pavilion was burned down by a 22-year-old novice monk, Hayashi Yoken, who then attempted suicide on the Daimon-ji hill behind the building. He survived, and was subsequently taken into custody. The monk was sentenced to seven years in prison, but was… Read more →
At the Drive-Thru
“Hi, would you like to try our new [insert product name here]?” “Do you think I’ll like it?” “Uh, I don’t know.” “Then why are you recommending it? Don’t you want me to be happy?” Read more →
Taco Warmer
Photo by supjchwa2 “Jack in the Box tacos have to be eaten when they’re hot, so when I buy them at the drive-thru, I also buy a bag of french fries, set the fries on top of the tacos and use them as a taco warmer to keep the tacos hot until I get them home and eat them.” “Do you eat the fries as well?” “No, I don’t eat the fries. I just use them to keep the tacos warm.” “The french fries keep the tacos warm?’ “Right.” “What keeps the french fries warm?” Read more →
Eating in Restaurants
Before venturing out of your home to eat in a restaurant, learn to chew with your mouth closed. This applies whether you’re 7 or 70 . . . Read more →
Comedy Pug
Hi everybody! It’s me, Lightning! I never have any leftovers when I eat but if I did, I would ask for a doggie bag. WHAAAAA–?! Thanks, I’ll be here all week! — Lightning Read more →
Pictures of Food
Years ago, if you wanted to show your friends a picture of your food, you’d have to break out the palette and the easel and paint one. Time-consuming! Nowadays, with the likes of Facebook and Instagram, it’s just point and click! Another way life gets better and better thanks to computers . . . Read more →
Food Trucks
Food trucks have always been the dining option of last resort — “roach coaches” we called them. Now food trucks are considered fashionable cuisine. People actually make an effort to find them and eat from them. Whoever’s in charge of brand management for the food truck industry has got to be a genius. Read more →
We Had Linguini for Dinner Tonight!
HW’s Election Previews: Proposition 37
From the Offical Voter Information Guide: Requires labeling of food sold to consumers made from plants or animals with genetic material changed in specified ways. Prohibits marketing such food, or other processed food, as “natural.” Provides exemptions. Fiscal Impact: Increased annual state costs from a few hundred thousand dollars to over $1 million to regulate the labeling of genetically engineered foods. Additional, but likely not significant, governmental costs to address violations under the measure. Notice this phrase: “Provides exemptions.” In other words, the statute requires certain things and prohibits certain other things — except when it doesn’t. Not that it matters because $1 million a year isn’t going to buy you a lot of enforcement anyway. Who wrote this proposition, Dr. Evil? Prop 37 is supported by people who hate freedom and having to think for themselves. Read more →
It’s Not Easy Being a Dog
I’m taking a nap upstairs but I’m hearing noises from downstairs. When I hear a noise, I have to estimate how likely it is to be food-related, and how likely it is if I get up and go downstairs I’ll be able to get some of it. I can stay right here and snooze. That’s a sure thing. Or I can go downstairs and try to get some food. But if I get up and go downstairs and I don’t get any food, then a good nap has been spoiled. I have to do this estimation every time I hear a noise. Being a dog is not as easy as people think. — Lightning Read more →
Turbinado Sugar = Crack Cocaine
Velvety
Why is it good for chocolate to be “velvety”? Do you really want a mouth full of velvet? Read more →
Who Pays for Dinner?
I’m listening to a couple of women talking about their new beaus and who should pay for the dinner dates in a budding relationship. Man pays? Take turns? 50/50? For what it’s worth, ladies, back when I was dating, I paid for the food, but depending on how the rest of the evening played out, I might have to say, “In that case, pay me back for the sandwiches.” Read more →
Happy Labor Day
When there’s BBQ ribs to be eaten, it’s every man for himself. Wait, that’s sexist. Let me rephrase. When there’s BBQ ribs to be eaten, it’s every mf’er for themselves. Happy Labor Day! Read more →
Refrigerators
Office email: A friendly reminder that all refrigerators will be cleaned out this Sunday. Please take anything home that you do not want thrown out. I do not want this carton of Macadamia Vanilla Bean ice cream to be thrown out. Wait — does it matter if I brought the item in, or just that I don’t want it to be thrown out? Read more →
Top Dog
Pizza and Pessimism
“There’s a slice of pizza missing,” my son announces. When I got home from work, there were two slices left over from last night. I ate one and left one for him. “I calibrated my appetite for two slices,” he says. “The pessimist,” I say, “sees that there’s one slice missing. The optimist sees that there’s one slice left.” Read more →